Film of Gray
by intotheblue101
Summary: As a sequel to "Sea of Blue," Katniss and Peeta have been together for five years now. Yet thinking their lives would ever settle down they were wrong. As Peeta has planned to propose to Katniss only to have a phone call interrupt and a series of events unfold... Note there is cursing... And sorry about the summary, I'm still working on it...
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

The Call

…

Feeling the morning sunlight stream through the blinds playing across my back I curl closer against the warm, firm pillow beside me. As I burrowed myself into the pillow I heard a rumble of ingenuous laughter vibrate through it. Confused I shifted my face inches away from the pillow forcing myself to open my eyes. Fluttering my eye lids open and closed a couple of times against the brightness that filled the room my eye s finally adjusted to see the figure lying beside me. The first thing that my eyes fell upon was the suntanned, broad, well-formed chest of a man. So looking up to see whom the chest belonged to my eyes laid upon a familiar face that consisted of short, curly blond locks, a stunning smile, a semi-uneven yet perfect shaped nose, and a set of striking sea blue eyes. Smiling down at me Peeta pulled me close pressing a soft kiss against my lips. "Morning." I smiled back bringing my arms ups so I could run them through his hair before wrapping them around his neck. "And to you."

He let out a short laugh at my remark before twisting to lie on his back. And as he turned I moved with him so as he laid on his back I laid across his chest. With our legs intertwined under the cotton sheets and arms wrapped around one another I pressed my cheek against his shoulder. "Can we just stay in bed and sleep the day away," I whispered in his ear groggily. I felt him shake his head no. "Why not?" He let out a breath. "Why are you so difficult," he asked placing kisses along my shoulder. I let out a laugh, "'Cause stubbornness is a well-known Everdeen trait. It's one of the many reasons why we are found so irresistible." He snorted. "Well I don't care how stubborn you are, we cannot stay in bed all day and sleep. Firstly, we can't because it's our one day off a week we have together so we have to do something together and sleeping the day away does not count as "doing something." Secondly, I have something planned for us this evening, a surprise."

I let out an obnoxious groan. "You know I hate surprises!" He continued to kiss along my shoulder doing his best to fight back the laughter I knew was building in his chest. "I do and I don't care. No matter what you do I will not tell you what it is and you cannot get out of it." Groaning into his chest he poked at my side with his fingers. "Come on, it's not that bad." I let out another groan. "But it is," I said pulling myself out of the embrace and out of the bed. "Oh really," he said lifting himself up onto his elbows. "Yes," I said grabbing a pair of shorts from the storage bench that stood at the foot of the bed along with a pair of boy shorts and a sport bra, "Because I hate surprises. They make me nervous and unsteady. And you're surprises just make me… make me feel like a complete wreck." "Is that so?" "Yes," I nearly shouted as I made my way from the bedroom into the bathroom. "Mh hmm," I heard him say to himself before calling out after me, "What do you want to eat for breakfast?" And as I turned on the hot water I called back out, "Pancakes!"

…

"Peeta," I called out as I made my away from the bathroom toward the kitchen as I knotted the elastic band in my hand at the tail of my braid, "Can you give me a hint of what the surprise is?" He didn't respond. "Come please," I pleaded walking through the living room, "_Please_." Still he didn't respond. Feeling a little annoyed I walked into the kitchen to see him nowhere in sight. "Peeta," I called out again. Still there was no response. Letting out a groan of frustration I quickly made my way through the flat checking every room till I found myself back in the kitchen. No Peeta. Leaning against the kitchen counter I looked down to see a small plate sitting on the island stacked three pancaked high with a note sitting beside them. Walking over I snatched the note into my hands.

_Katniss_

_I went out to get things ready for tonight. I'll be back at 8 to get you for our date._

_Love, Peeta_

_No snooping around, it's a surprise for a reason!_

Letting out a laugh at the last part I couldn't help, but think that Peeta knew me a little too well. But no matter what he had written me he would have known that I wasn't one to listen, I was stubborn. I was going to find out what the hell he had planned for tonight. I was not going to have a repeat of my twenty-first birthday again. My twenty-first birthday I couldn't help but think of even though I didn't want to dwell on the subject. It was a fun night, but god I nearly had a heart attack. I hated surprises, period. Shaking the thought from my head my eyes focused on the words: Love, Peeta. They made my inside flip and a shiver travel through my spine. Peeta loved me and I loved him and I don't know how the hell it worked but it did and that was something I was more than happy about. Smiling my attention finally fell on the plate of pancakes. Dam Peeta and his abilities to cook, I thought, what the hell wasn't he good at.

…

Following eating the pancake breakfast Peeta had left me I looked to the clock to see how long I had till he would return to pick me up for our date. It was a little before ten now and Peeta wasn't coming to get me to eight so I had about ten hours to kill before he would be back for our date. I had ten hours to find out what Peeta had in store for the night. Now I just had to find out who I could trick into spilling the beans to me. Gale? No I don't think Gale and Peeta had talked lately and even if they had Gale was just as stubborn as I was and most likely wouldn't tell me if he knew. Annie, I thought; but no, I wouldn't be able to get her to tell me because she was working at the bakery so there was a good chance that Eric or Peeta or someone would be around to stop her. Rye, no he was probably still asleep and even if he wasn't he'd probably just make some sort of sexual joke or tease me about how in situations like this Peeta had me "wrapped around his finger." Marvel? No, he wasn't that reliable and neither was Johanna. I could call Marcus, but he would probably rat me out to Peeta. Finnick, I thought, yeah I could get Finn to tell me.

…

Standing in front of the Ocean Realm Exhibit at the Sea Side Aquarium I watched as the different colored and sized fish swam behind the thick sheet of glass. The tank held 760,000 gallons of seawater in which fish and sea creatures like stingrays, silky sharks, needlefish, blue runners, zebra sharks, shark rays, hammerheads, and so on and so on swam about. I was waiting for Finn so in the mean time I decide I would visit my favorite exhibit in the aquarium. I knew this aquarium like the back of my hand. Peeta and I use to come here every over week last year and this was the exhibit we would always start and end our day at the aquarium with. So here I was waiting. I had texted Finn over two hours ago telling that I was coming to visit him at one. So being the gentlemen he is he told me he would take his lunch break following the twelve o'clock tour he was giving for some kids birthday. It was growing close to one and any minute now Finn would appear and I would find out about Peeta's surprise for tonight.

Watching as one of the zebra sharks swam by the glass I felt a hand clam onto my shoulder causing me to jump in surprise. And then I heard Finn's familiar laugh. "Easy there Kitty," he said as I turned to him see him holding two cups of coffee. Handing one of the cups to me he took a drink from his before stating, "If you're here to get me to spill the beans about Peeta's surprise for you tonight I'm not going to say peep." "Dammit," I muttered under my breath stomping my foot, "Why not?" He laughed looking to the stingray swimming past us. "Because Peeta worked non-stop over the last couple of months to make sure tonight would just go swimmingly and I'm not going to ruin it. Plus is fun seeing you like this." The only thing that catches me off guard is when Finn said a couple months. "Months," I ask. I know Peeta was invested time into these dates and surprises and maybe spent a few days max planning them out, but a couple months seemed a bit much. Finn nods his head. "Calm down Kitty you know Peeta beyond and above over these things."

But I feel like I'm in shock. Months. _Months_. Looking to Finn I ask in all seriousness. "He didn't plan something outrageous did he? Like a surprise vacation? Or something like- something like eloping?" Finn seems to be catch off guard about what I last said, but he doesn't let it faze him. "Kitty," he says nudging me with his elbow, "Calm down. None of those things are going to happen. This is Peeta were talking about." I nod my head. This is Peeta we're talking about. Peeta, nice loving stable gentlemanly organized fun Peeta. Still unconsciously nodding my head I take a sip of my coffee. God I hate surprises, I think. And as Finn and I both turn away from Ocean Realm Exhibit we walk down to the hall toward the Stingray Beach Touch Exhibit in the next room over. Entering the room to see a group of kids crowded around the small pool touching the harmless stingray I see a smile light up across Finn's face. "You're not going to elope or go on some crazy vacation. It's not going to be like your twenty-first birthday," he says, "I can't tell what you're doing, but I can tell you what you should wear."

…

Fixing the brown, twine belt around my waist I looked at my reflection in the bathroom mirror. With Finn's help and guidance I found myself wearing the dress I had worn to Gale's welcome home party last year. It was the dress I had gotten from the boutique that Effie Trinket owned and still owns beside Mellark's Bakery because at the time Effie and Haymitch were "friends" and being Haymitch's family I received a thirty percent discount. It was simple and fun dress. It was a beige colored dress like the sand. The dress reached my mid-thigh with a nice breezy flare. There was an elastic pull at the waist that pleated into a full frilly skirt that gracefully swayed when I twisted my waist. Then at the top was a sheer chiffon yoke that Effie called a "trompe l'oeil sweetheart neckline;" basically it was a sheer see-through fabric that began just above my breast and ran up around my neck. And finally there was the brown, twine belt I had added to the outfit.

Pleased with myself I looked at phone, seven fifty-six. I had four minutes. Quickly applying some mascara and a natural shade of eye shadow I looked to my phone again. Seven fifty-nine. I had one minute to spare. Flicking off the bathroom light I snatched my bag off my bed before heading in the direction of the door. And just as I snatched my shoes off the floor beside the door I heard a knocking come from the other side of the door. Looking to see what time it was, it was eight o'clock. On time as expected. Letting out a huff I reached to twist the front door open. There on the other side stood Peeta. He wore plain pressed black jeans and a white collared shirt whose sleeves he had rolled up to his elbows. Quickly lacing up my high tops I gave Peeta a giddy smile. "Hi." "Hey," he replied leaning down to kiss me on my cheek, "You ready?" I nodded my head slinging my bag over my shoulder. "Okay," he said opening the door when his phone began to ring, "Ah." Picking up his facial expression quickly changed from joyful to serious. And after a few moments of saying yes he finally hung up only to turn to me saying, "We have to go to the hospital, now."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The Surprise

…

Peeta dropped me off a block away from the hospital so I could go find Marcus while he went in search for somewhere to park the truck. So carefully weaving my way through the parked ambulances, doctors talking to fellow nurses, and casual bystanders who were drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes scattered outside Mercy Hospital I finally made my way into the ER waiting room. Stopping myself short just after entering the room I looked around. For it being nine twenty on a Sunday night I was surprised to see how crowded the waiting room of the hospital's emergency room was. God, how many people get emergency related injures on Sunday nights, I think. But how crowded the emergency room was or wasn't really didn't mattered right now, I needed to find Marcus. So looking around the large waiting room and through the rows of plastics seats Marcus was nowhere in sight. Growing worried I subconsciously began to twist my hands together in angst. Dammit, where are you Marcus?

Back at the entrance of the room I spotted an empty plastic chair. Walking over I stepped on top of the plastic chair about to look around the room when I felt something tugging at the bottom of my dress. Looking down I saw a fair skinned man looking up at me. Shit, I think, security. "Oh, sorry sir," I said stepping down off the seat, "I know I'm probably not supposed to be standing on the seats, but I was looking for a friend of mine whose supposed to be here and I can't find him and…" I trail on till I realize the man is smiling at me trying to hold back his laughter. "Wait you're not… you're not a hospital security guard are you?" He laughs shaking his head no. "Dressed like this?" "Right," I say taking his apparel of dark jeans and a black V-neck with a golden chain around his neck, "That wouldn't make much sense." He laughs again, "You're exactly as Marcus described you." Marcus? Did he just say Marcus? "You know Marcus," I ask. "Yeah," he says, "Com'on they just put him in a room. I'll show you where he is." "Thank you," I say, "Really thank you." "No problem," he says, "I'm Cinna by the way."

…

As he wrapped his sports jacket around my shoulders Peeta kissed the top of my head. "Hey, I'll be right back. I'm going to go down to the cafeteria and get us some coffee to drink." I nod my head in agreement. A nice cup of coffee would be fantastic right now especially after being here for five some hours. Then giving me a heartwarming smile I watch him as he walked out the room. The moment he was gone I heard from behind me, "I ruined your guys' night didn't I?" Turning to face Marcus I took in the butterfly bandages that cover the stitch's he now has along the top of his left eyebrow and the sling in which his right arm rested. "No," I say shaking my head. Getting up from my seat beside the door I walk over to sit at the foot of Marcus's hospital bed. "Yeah, I did. I know I did," he says in frustration letting out a sigh, "Peeta's face says it all. Even if you don't know it I ruined your guys' night." "No you didn't ruin anything," I restate nudging his thigh with my foot, "We didn't even make it out the front door before your friend, Cinna, called." He groaned again. "That's even worse. He worked so hard to make sure tonight went perfectly. He was so excited, too. I can't believe I fucked it all up."

Leaning forward to console Marcus a black, velvet box fell out from the inside of Peeta's jacket. That's when I felt every bone in my body stiffen. That's when I felt every muscle I had contract. It was as if by some freak of nature my body had become petrified. What was that? Was it what I thought it was? Shakily reaching out I took the box into my hand. Should I open it? What if it is what I think it is? What will I do? My mind racing I didn't realize my other hand reaching over opening the box till it was too late. And there inside the box was exactly what I thought it was, a ring. It was a simple silver ban with three aligned diamonds. It was perfect. God, I think, he was going to propose to me tonight. Shit, no wonder Finn refused to tell me what Peeta had planned and why Marcus was angry with himself for interrupting. He was going to propose to me. My mind running on overdrive I thought, what would I have said? And that's when I found myself drawing a blank. I don't know what I would have said. Yes, I think, yes. I loved Peeta, he was my everything, more than my everything. I'm sure I would have said yes, maybe. The whole marriage and kid thing were still iffy subjects with me. But I'm sure I would have said yes… maybe... no, yes…

Looking up I came to see Marcus staring at me with a sad, worried expression. "He was going to propose to me tonight," I ask. Marcus nodded his head. Sitting up, Marcus moved over till he was seated beside me. "He loves you, always have. I'm surprised he hasn't done it years ago… But it was your five year anniversary today and he thought it would be perfect. You know he's a classic romantic… He was going to take you down to the dunes along the beach in front of Haymitch's house. That's where you two went to that bonfire party... He had a blast that night, you know? That was the first time you talked to him…. He was making your favorite he told me. Cheese buns with something like fruit I think. He even went through the trouble of buying some of those outrageous fireworks you guys set off during the summer following his junior year of college." Marcus paused shaking his head. "You guys were going to eat on the dunes. Then you were going light the fireworks off. The grand gester. That's when Peeta was going to pop the question." Falling silent we both looked down at the ring. After a long moment with his good arm Marcus reached over shutting the box before slipping back in the pocket within Peeta's jacket.

"I won't tell if you don't," he said with a dejected smile, "The kid deserves his chance to ask you on his own terms so don't go telling him you found the ring or tell him you knew what his plans were for tonight." I nod my head fiddling with my fingers. And thinking that keeping this from Peeta would be simple I am proven wrong when I see Peeta walk into the room with three cups of coffee. You have to tell him, my mind shouts at me but I just shake my head, this is going to be hard. "Hey," he said to us handing us each a cup of coffee, "So Marcus I just talked to the doc and you're free to go. I signed you out and all. But-" "But," Marcus groaned, "Peety no buts." "Well if you didn't get yourself into a bar fight then there would be no buts, but that didn't happen," Peeta snapped trying to control his anger. Yeah, Peeta was mad that Marcus for ruining our night. "Since you have a pretty bad concussion the doctor said you shouldn't be alone and you can only sleep a few hours at a time or something. So basically you need someone to take care of you." "Okay I'll call Cinna," Marcus said. But Peeta shook his head, "I already did. He's going out of town on business till Thursday. And neither can Jules or Chad help you out." "I'll do it," I interject, "I'll take care of him."

…

With much persuasion I had convinced Peeta to let me stay in the city and take care of Marcus at least till Cinna came back from his business trip on Thursday. Peeta tried telling me he could do it, but I pointed out to him that Rye, Marvel and Johanna were working for me this week while he only had Annie on staff at the bakery till his dad recovered from the stomach flu he had come down with a couple days ago. So here I was hours later pulling up in front of Marcus's apartment building with a duffle bag filled with everything I could possibly need for a week and my motorcycle strapped in the back of Peeta's pickup. Pulling the key out of the ignition I don't realize Peeta opening the driver's side door till I feel his lips pressed against my jaw. "Missed you," he mumbles kissing along my jaw. I laugh as he kisses along my jaw to just below my ear tugging on my earlobe with his teeth which he knows usually drives me crazy, but the exhaustion that has over taken my body says otherwise. "I have barely been gone for three hours," I say, "What are you going to do while I'm gone all week?"

"Drive up every night to see you," he says in all seriousness. I pull him away from my jaw so he's looking me in the eyes. "No you're not," I say in a stern voice, "Cause that means you would have to close the bakery early to get up here at a reasonable hour and I refuse for you guys to lose business because of me." "It wouldn't be because of you," he says, "It would be because of me and my lack of you." "Too bad," I say kissing him on the lips as I slid out of the truck with my duffle bag in hand, "You'll have to wait till Friday to see me." He lets out a groan of frustration shutting the door behind me. "So stubborn you are," he mutters under his breath. "I know," I shout over my shoulder as I began to untie to ropes attached to my motorcycle. "I still can't believe you brought this thing up here," he says helping me, "You could have just used Marcus's car or called a taxi or walked if you need to go anywhere." Wheeling the bike toward him so he could lift it out of the trunk I said, "I'm stubborn, remember?" He laughed lifting me out of the bed of the truck following the bike. "How could I forget," he said kissing me.

Wrapping my arms around his neck I returned his kiss. "Sorry for being a party pooper, but there's always got to be one… And you got to go," I say unhappily, "Annie said she'll cover today, but you have to open tomorrow because she has a yoga class in the morning." Peeta let out a groan. "I know," I say kissing him along his sculpted cheek bone, "Life sucks." Leaning in to kiss me one more time it isn't after several moments that Peeta breaks away from the kiss. "Call me tonight," he says leaning his forehead against mine. I nod my head. "I promise. And promise me you won't close the bakery early and drive up here tomorrow night." Peeta let out another groan. "Do I have to?" I nod my head, "I'll be back on Friday. You can suffer a few days without me. You can call me whenever or we'll video chat or whatever, but I refuse to let you close the bakery and lose customers." "Fine," he says obviously not pleased with the agreement, "You better answer." I laugh. "Promise." Kissing him one last time before he climbs into the driver's side of the truck cab I say, "I love you." "I love you, too," he says with a smile, "Always?" I smile back at him, "Always."

In that moment everything is perfect. I love Peeta Mellark. Peeta Mellark loves me. He bought an engagement ring and was going to ask me to marry him last night till… "Wait," I say to Peeta causing him to twist the key out of the truck's ignition. "What?" Swiftly taking off his jacket I hand it through the driver's side window. "I nearly forgot to give this back to you." "Oh you could of kept it-," he says only to stop himself as he realized what he was saying, "No never mind, I need that jacket this week. Thanks." "No problem," I say giving him one last kiss before stepping away from the truck, "I'll see you Friday." He nods his head, "I call you later on tonight." "I'll answer," I say before asking, "Always?" He smiles like a two year old. "Always." And then twisting the key in the ignition Peeta puts the truck into drive and in no time disappears between the city streets.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The Brother

…

"Ahhh," I screech, turning away from Marcus which causes him to laugh even harder. "You're so innocent," he says, "It's like you've never seen someone's cock, but from what I know Peeta says otherwise." "No, I'm not innocent. And whose genitals I have or haven't seen isn't any of your business," I retort angrily, "Now put on some pants for god sakes." Hearing him laugh even louder than before, he snatched the pair of sweatpants from my hands. As he slipped on the pants I heard the rustling of cloths and a few exasperated grunts before the room behind me fell silent and I heard Marcus say, "You can look now Kitty, my manhood is out of eyesight." Turning to see Marcus dressed in the pair of sweatpants he had taken from me I punch him playfully in his good shoulder. "Ow," he says, "What was that for?" "For being an ass," I say gathering his sling and shirt in my hands, "Now sit down and set me get this sling on you before you screw your shoulder up even more." Silently obeying Marcus sat down on the edge of the sink's counter allowing me to pull his t-shirt over him subsequent following me setting him arm up into the sling contraption for his shoulder.

Fastening the velcro pulls and straps of Marcus's sling he grunted in irritation and possibly pain. "Sorry," I mumbled making sure his arm was positioned correctly. "It's okay," he said gritting his teeth, "My fault anyway I got my arm screwed up like this." Just nodding my head, we didn't talk any further subject of the supposed bar fight Marcus go into or anything dealing with that night. Helping Marcus up, I shut off the bathroom lights before we made our way to the kitchen. Once in the kitchen Marcus took a seat at the counter while I began to make some grill cheese sandwiches for us. Flipping the sandwiches on the grill Marcus said, "You know, you're good at this," as he handed me a beer. "This," I said questioned taking a sip from my beer. "Yeah, this," Marcus said waving his good arm in a circular motion, "Taking care of people, cooking, being nice when one shouldn't be, cleaning, exedra, exedra. You're really good at the whole… mothering thing, you're a natural. It's another reason no wonder Peeta wants to settle down with you, you'll be a great mom." "Mh hmm," I say as I flip Marcus's grill cheese onto a plate cutting it in half before sliding it over toward him.

"You're still not sold on the whole kid, mom thing are you?" I shake my head. "The whole marriage thing is still I messed up in my mind. I'm sure I'll say yes to Peeta, I love him. I hate when he's not around and when he is around everything is better. He's all I got; he's my everything and so much more. I would marry Peeta but… but kids. I don't want to have kids and have them end up like me." Marcus looks up at me. "Like you? You make it sound like it's something bad, like there's something wrong with you." That's was when unexpectedly my hand slammed against the counter. "There is… It was awful Marcus, something a child should never have to experience," I nearly scream, "My mom was never there after my dad died and… and I was left to take care of Prim. Shit, I was eleven. And I did everything I could for Prim so her life was semi-decent, but supposedly that wasn't enough. God, and me- me I'm fucked… I ran away when the man who is willing to marry told me he loved me five years ago and since I haven't been always been the most emotionally stable nor best person in the world. Shit. Shit. Shit."

I don't realize what is happening till I see Marcus standing in front of me with my jacket in hand. "Put it on," he demands and without question I do. Once I have my jacket on and my shoes laced up and have helped Marcus with his own we are walking out of his apartment building. A few blocks away from his apartment I ask, "Where are we going?" "To The Third Pint," he says, "It's a cheap yet outstandingly, fantastic bar a few blocks away." Nodding my head I ask another question. "Why?" At this Marcus smiles wrapping his good arm around my shoulder. "Many reasons, but basically because we both need a night off," he says, "Since you found the ring you have been over edge. And whenever you talk to Peeta I can see you falling apart, dying to tell him you know. It's like you have been rethinking everything when everything is going quite swell I must say. So I figured we'd get a few drinks and if that doesn't get you out of this funk I figured if you got a few shots in me I might tell you about the bar fight I into. Doesn't that sound nice?" Looking to him I poke him in the ribs, "Sounds like a night."

…

Rolling over my body came in contact with something hard yet soft and warm. Groaning in distress as the massive hangover I had pounded against my skull I opened my eyes to see myself lying beside Marcus under the twisted sheets of the bed. Nearly letting out a blood curdling scream I shuffled backwards in fear till I fell off the bed and onto the floor. My heading pounding and heart racing I brought my arms up to wrap them around my chest only to find myself without a shirt on. Quickly being to freak out even more so I pressed my left palm to my temple as I watched Marcus rolled out of the bed. On his feet Marcus looked around the room till his eyes laid on me cowering in the cover against the wall parallel to him. "Katniss," he asked cautiously stepping toward me. "What- what happ- happened last n- night?" I stuttered out afraid of what the answer may be. "We-," Marcus began only to stop himself as he had to think of what actually had happened last night.

After a long minute Marcus began to speak again. "I suggested we go out for drinks because you were stressing out over Peeta and the ring and that whole ordeal. So we went down to The Third Pint where we had a few drinks before meeting up with... No, we ran into Beetee and Wiress from my work. After a few shots I think we were… Yeah, we were cut off so we- so we then went down to Dead Dog Saloon a few blocks down… We had a few more drinks and some wings. Then- and then…" Finding himself drawing a blank Marcus removed his hand from his forehead and reached into his pants pocket. After a moment he pulled out his phone along with a small slip of paper from his pocket. Watching as he read the paper his eyes flickered to me in dread. "And I have a receipt for the purchase of one large tattoo from Mike's Tats & Piercings." "You got a tattoo," I ask pleading it wasn't me. But to my disappointment he shook his head no biting on his lower lip as he pointed to my side.

Lifting up my right arm revealed a substantially large tattoo of a tribal arrow down along my right ribcage. The feathered tail of the arrow began midway along my ribcage between my shoulder and elbow. Then arrow 's shaft went down along a diagonal across my skin for about a good three or four inches before becoming to a fade halt. Inches from where the tattoo halted I ran my fingers over the remnants of what remained from the scars I had received from years ago during the car crash that has caused Prim's death. Across the scars the arrow started up again spanning about three more inches till the shaft met the head of the arrow. The arrows head was scratchily shaded in where it ended at the bottom of my rib cage. Just grazing the fingertips of my left hand over the arrow I recognized along the tip of the shaft near the head of the arrow was written _Wade_ followed two years and nearing the tail of the arrows was written Prim followed by two years. The names written were the ones I had lost and the dates written was the time in which they had lived and the arrow was the numerous shots that life had taken me but yet never had exactly shot to kill.

As my arm lowered down from above my head I wrapped it around my waist. I got a tattoo. I got a tattoo that showed all my flaws, all my weaknesses, and all my worst nightmares. Clutching my arms tighter than humanly possible around my chest I didn't care about the pain I felt. It hurt, killed, but it felt good. Feeling the tears begin to cascade over my eyelids and down my cheeks I felt something soft and warm wrap around me. Looking up, blinking through the tears I watched as Marcus sat himself down beside me, wrapping his arm around my shoulder, rubbing up and down my trying to calm me, he allowed me to rest my head on his shoulder. "God why are you getting so damn emotional over a freakin' tattoo," he said in a shaky sarcastic tone, "I mean what the hell is going to happen when Peeta ask you to marry him?" Laughing at Marcus semi-failed attempt to make me feel better I jabbed my hand against his chest. "You suck," I muttered. "I know," he said laughing in response, "But you love me anyway."

…

Finishing wrapping the bandage around my ribcage, I buttoned the lower half of my flannel shirt. Five o'clock, time to go. Making my way out of Marcus's spare bedroom I found myself in the apartment's living room in search of Marcus. I had to say goodbye to my favorite, well tied for second best, Mellark. About to call out I felt something tap me on the shoulder. Spinning around I saw Marcus standing in front of me his good arm spread open out in front of him. "Give your brother-to-be a hug," he said wiping his head back in a dramatic manner as if he was doing a hair flip. Letting out a childish laugh I wrapped my arms around his torso and he wrapped his left arm around my back. "You know this may be the last time I see you alive," I say against his chest. "I'm sure we'll see each other again," he laughed giving me a squeeze, "Don't worry, I don't think Peety is one to beat up a cripple. And if he does come for me just give me a heads up would ya so I can call up Cinna to guard the front door."

Hearing a snort come from across the room Cinna's voice followed. "I've seen your brother, Marcus, and he doesn't look like a kid to be reckoned with when pissed." "Fuck you," Marcus called back. "Fuck you? You know I gladly would," Cinna responded plopping himself down on the couch, "But I think Portia would get pissed about that. I mean you being her boyfriend or friends-with-benefits or whatever the hell you two are and she being my sister, just wouldn't be right." Hysterically laughing so much that my stomach began to cramp, I pulled away from Marcus's hug trying to calm myself. When my frenetic laughter finally subsided I leaned over picking my duffle bag up off the floor beside the front door. With a firm grip I slung the bag over my shoulder. "I got to go." "You better come around more often," he said with a devious smile. "I think it'll be a while before I return," I snorted, "But I'll call." Nodding his head I stepped toward the open door. "Bye Cinna," I called out across the room. Giving me a slight wave of the hand he smiled, "Cya around Katniss." And then I was out the door back to Naval Cove.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

The Knowing

…

Feeling the bed dip down beside me I knew what was happening and it wasn't an idea I was particularly welcome to it. Then as expected I felt Peeta's hand softly shake my shoulder. At his touch I let out a muffled moan of protest into the pillow. "Five mores minutes." But Peeta's soft laughter said otherwise. "You got to get up," he said, "You've been asleep since you got back this morning and it's nearly six now. You have to get up and eat and shower and move around." "I showered this morning," I retorted burying my head deeper into the pillow as if it would block out his voice. "You still have to get up and eat something and stretch your legs." "No," I mumbled snuggling deeper into the bed's sheets, "A human can live up to about four days without food and stretching has been proven in certain events to cause horrendous injuries." "Katniss," Peeta said in a stern yet playful tone, "You have to get up." Groaning again I shuffled and twisted under the sheets before I curled up into a small ball in an attempt of concealing myself in with the bed.

Then I let out a screaking yelp of pain as I felt Peeta's hand come in contact with my ribcage where I had drunkenly gotten my tattoo Wednesday night. Feeling Peeta's weight lift off the bed I could hear his feet shuffle against the wooden floor in panic. "Katniss," he said, "You okay? What's wrong?" "Don't touch there," I said through my teeth. "What happened?" "Nothing," I lied stealthily. But being Peeta, he caught the lie. "Katni-" He began to say, but I cut in off firmly restating. "Nothing happened, Peeta." A minute went by in silence causing me to think Peeta had bought the lie. Nevertheless hearing Peeta's feet shuffle and the bed slightly dip down I felt his hands begin to unbutton the lower half of my flannel shirt. Thinking I could just shift my hand over and stop him I knew if I did it would only be a matter of time before he found out and by then everything would be much worse. Now feeling as his hand reached the last button just below my chest he flipped over the right side of the shirt up revealing the bandage. Letting out a small gasp as I flinched at his touch, Peeta began to peel away the bandage.

Now with the bandage completely removed, the room fell silent. Peeta didn't say a word. I was holding my breath. I was freaking out. I was worried what he would say. Peeta didn't like tattoos. He loved art, but tattoos had always been a different story. Say something Peeta, my mind shouted, say something! Squeezing my eyes shuts I let out a breath only to quickly suck on another just as quickly. I ruined everything, I think, this is it. Yet feeling Peeta's fingertips just barely outline the arrow head he said, "You got a tattoo." "Yeah," I said nodding my head, "I didn't mean to… But I did… It kind of happened." I pause as I feel the bed dip beside me letting me know that Peeta had shifted himself so he was now lying beside me. "Marcus and I went out…," I begin, "I guess we drank too much. I don't- I don't really know… I woke in the morning with it." Feeling his fingers run up the arrow's shaft he asked, "Why did you get drunk?" Why? Oh that's the million dollar question Peeta, I think, with a billion dollar answer I can't spare you... Because I know about the engagement ring and your elaborate proposal plan, I want to tell him, but I don't, I can't.

Opening my eyes I look down at his chest, away from his face making sure I wouldn't make eye contact. "Nightmares," I mumble speaking half truthfully. Five years and I still had nightmares; it was kind of pathetic if you think about it. But most nights without Peeta or a sense of safety protecting me from them, they would always seem to plague my mind when I shut my eyes. Wednesday night had been the only true time that I had slept at Marcus's that had lasted more than an hour or two without me waking up in a cold sweat and a scratchy feeling in my throat. I know that the boozes and shots of god-knows-what had probably helped me fall into my dreamless slumber and I knew that was considered a bad thing, but I pushed that fact away. I had slept. Focusing on Peeta's fingers tips artistically sketching out the tattoo repeatedly along my skin he drew himself closer toward me. "I like it," he said softly against the top of my hairline. "You do," I asked surprised looking up. "Mh hmm," he nodded, "I know I'm not a fan of tattoos, but this is you… It shows how strong and passionate you are, loving and respectful. It shows everything good about you." Under my breath I said to myself, "It shows my flaws."

Yet catching what I said Peeta lifted my chin so I was looking him in the eye. "Hey," he said, "You're flaws are what I find so perfect about you." Ahhh damn you Peeta, I think, why did you have to be so damn perfect with words. "Okay?" I nodded my head reluctantly as I couldn't help, but find myself believing in his words. Then finding ourselves both growing closer toward one another I asked. "So I don't have to get out of bed?" Peeta laughed. "Five more minutes." Bursting into a fit of giggles we molded ourselves together, legs intertwined and arms encircling one another. And as we laid there time passed by and with time I found myself drifting back to sleep. I was safe from all them, the nightmares, but I was more pleased with the fact that I had Peeta by my side. As my eyes began to close I leaned my head in so it rested just under Peeta's chin. Nonetheless by the sound of Peeta's heart beat I knew he was still awake so I asked, "So you're not going to kill Marcus?" "Oh, I'm going to kill Marcus," he said, "That bastard has it coming for him." This causing me to burst into another fit of giggles Peeta and I spent hours in bed drifting in and out of sleep only leaving the other's side to either visit the bathroom or to retrieve something to snack on from the kitchen.

…

Wandering into the kitchen, Haymitch was seated at the counter beside Chaff, Plutarch, and Seeder playing a game of bull. "What the hell Chaff," Plutarch broke out collecting the pile of cards that rested in the center of them, "I thought we were on the same side." Chaff laughed setting down a card into the center. "One Ace," he said before responding, "You didn't think I wouldn't side with my wife, my wife." "Two twos," Plutarch grunted tossing two cards into the newly made pile, "You suck." Setting the grocery bags down on the counter Seeder said to me, "Hey dear." "Hey Seed," I responded coming up beside Haymitch, "You winning." She shrugged her shoulders. "Think so. I know I'm at least beating Chaff and Plutarch over here. I can't say the same about your old man though; the guy knows how to lie." "I know to lie," Chaff peeped up. "And then you married me," Seeder responded with a smirk. Then tossing down a card Seeder said, "Okay boys, count the cards to see who has the least." "What, come on I just got the whole pile," Plutarch wined, "Ten more minutes." "No," Seeder said, "It's about time we go. Katniss is here and she and Haymitch got to have their weekly family dinner." Huffing and puffing Plutarch gave in and in fifteen minutes they were gone.

As the door behind them shut, I began to unpacking the grocery bag I had brought while Haymitch ventured off down the hall with the deck on cards in his hand. It wasn't still minutes later that Haymitch reappeared. He took his usual seat at the counter after filling up a glass of water from the sink. As he drank from his glass I prepared dinner, stirring the noodle and vegetable stir-fried around the saucer-pan. "So I take it the boy didn't ask you," Haymitch said abruptly. What!? Jerking around, I waved the spoon in my hand at him. "You knew!" He grunted, "Asked me months ago for your hand." What! "And you never thought to bring it up?" He let out a snort. "Now sweetheart, what would have been the fun in that? I mean usually when being asked to be married the lady doesn't know about the man's proposal." Glaring at him in anger I turned away from him back to the stove. Frustrated, I mused up all my anger and prevention at Haymitch and put it toward the stir-fired. God, why couldn't he have told me about this!? As I angrily poked and stirred the food, Haymitch spoke again. "So how do you know about the boy's choice of rings if he hasn't popped the question yet?"

Shit. Ignore it Katniss, my brain tells me, don't answer that question. So turning off the stove I scooped the stir-fried from the pan and into a bowl before placing it on the counter where Haymitch was seated. Then grabbing two plates and a pair of forks I placed one in front of Haymitch and the other across from him where I usually sat. Taking my seat across from him, I ignored his pervious question and now searching eyes as I took a portion of the stir-fried on my plate. I continued to ignore Haymitch, slowly eating my meal. I thought I was going to be able to make it through without having to answer Haymitch's question, but then he said in that parentally stern voice. "Katniss?" Ahhh, dammit. "It fell out of his jacket." I mumbled piling a portion of vegetables into my mouth. "And he doesn't know that you know?" I shook my head no, "And I'd like to keep it that way." Haymitch nodded his head, testing his portion of food. He ate a few mouthfuls and so did I for a few minutes before one of broke the silence. "You know he's going to find out sooner or later," he said, "And it won't be pretty." "I know it won't be," I said, "I know."

…

I knew about the ring. The ring. Haymitch knew that I knew about the ring. Marcus knew that I knew about the ring. Was I aware that anyone else knew that I knew about the ring? No, not that I knew of. Did Peeta know? That was a big, fat no. Peeta knew about the tattoo. The tattoo. Everything was going great and then pow! Everything was going oh so horribly. I knew that Peeta had bought me a freakin' engagement ring. An engagement right! He wanted to marry me. And I didn't tell him I knew about it. I had to tell Peeta, but I couldn't. Every time I saw him there was a pang of guilt inside me. I wanted to tell him, but at the same time I didn't. I wanted him to have the chance to ask me on his own terms. He deserved his "grand-jester" as Marcus had said before. He deserved everything to go right for once. He deserved whatever he wanted. I wanted him to have his chance, what he deserved.

I had to tell him though. It was eating me alive. The guilt inside me kept building and building and sooner or later I was going to explode. I just wanted it all to be over. I wanted the guilt to be gone and Peeta to know and for us be us again, not Peeta being Peeta while I was freaking. But god life was just not fair. Life was one big game. It was a game that seemed to be where everyone and everything was out to get you and you were fighting to stay alive. You were fighting to make it through so you could go home and live in a fancy, new home with some money and not give a freakin' care in the world. Yet I felt that if I won this game or not didn't really matter because in the end nothing could truly be perfect and there was always going to be someone out there just to make think it all over. I was fighting for Peeta, for us to be us, for us to live happily ever after, but that odds forming just didn't seem to be in my favor.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

The Break

…

It has been seventeen days since I found out about the engagement ring Peeta had bought me and the grand proposal he had thought up. He has not said a word about getting married or the number of kids he wants or anything involving a proposal. The guilt that has begun to build in me these past few days has become unbearable. I am slowly deteriorating. I have to tell him I know. It is no longer a choice, I must tell Peeta. I had talked to Marcus the other day about telling Peeta I knew and all Marcus did was give me a scolding. I hung up on him and haven't talked to him since. My head was pounding, so much shit was going on. I couldn't take it. The guilt was too much. I had to tell him. I didn't care anymore if I gave him his chance or not to make his grand gesture. He was Peeta, I would marry him if he asked me to in the middle of the ocean during a hurricane while I was puking up my guts. He was Peeta and no matter how perfect or not his proposal was I would say yes. The longer I waited this out the worse it would get. And if Peeta was to propose I wasn't sure I would be able to act surprised either. I sucked at acting, at lying, at the whole pretending ideal. I had to tell him and that's all I was certain about right now. I didn't know what would happen when I did, but I knew I had to.

…

"Katniss." I heard I concerned voice say from somewhere unknown. "Katniss?" The voice repeated. What? Wondering who was calling me I let go of my feet, standing up straight to see Annie looking at me. "Katniss, you okay?" I looked to her confused. "Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" "Why wouldn't you be," she laughed, "Kat, you've been bending over holding onto the balls of your feet for dear life for about the last ten minutes." Quickly looking around the beach, everything had changed from what I remember it being just seconds ago. More than half of Annie's morning yoga class had disappeared or were in the process of making their way off the beach. The sun was a little higher in the sky. A few beach goers had pitched their umbrellas and laid out their towels. And Annie, herself was standing in front of me, her straw mat rolled up under her arm ready to leave before I was. "Sorry," I mumble stepping off my mat, rolling it up and tucking it under my left arm before grabbing my canteen from where it sat in the sand before me. "Sorry," I repeated, "Ready to go?" She nodded her head.

Making out way off the beach Annie nudged me with her elbow. "You okay," she asked, "You've been a little off these past few days." I nodded my head. "Yeah, I'm fine," I say, "Just got a lot on my mind. Summer is going to be in full swing next week or so and I need to make sure the bar is A-Okay. And some other shit." "Other shit?" She questions. "Yeah," I say nodding my head, "Haymitch and Marcus… don't really want to talk about it. Plus I gotta tell Peeta something which is kind of freaking me out." She looked at me with one of her classical concerned motherly expressions. "Do I want to know?" "No, probably not. And anyway it's not something I really feel like sharing." Nodding her head, we walk in silence to the car. Even once we're in the car neither one of us say a word. It isn't till Annie pulls up to the back stairwell behind the bar that leads up to my flat that she spoke again. "You're not breaking up with Peeta are you?" "No," I say, "God no Annie, I'd be an idiot to do that… I just hope he doesn't break up with me when I tell him something." She nods her head as I let myself out of the car. "Well, good luck then Katniss," she says before putting the car in drive, "But I would say you'll be okay, Peeta loves you too much to let you go."

…

Today I was going to tell Peeta; today was the day I was going to tell Peeta about the ring. It was decided, written in stone and all. It was nearing nine now and any minute Marvel would be here to help out with the Saturday night crowd plus it would give me a few moments with Peeta to talk. As I slid a beer across the bar toward a dark haired man in exchange for a couple dollar bills, I felt something quickly and quietly poke my sides causing me to jump. Letting out a surprised squeal, I turned around to see Rye looking to me with a devious smile. "Marvel is here darling," he said as he filled pitcher with beer beside me at the tap, "He just walked into the kitchen and should be out any second." Nodding my head, I untied the black apron from around my waist and tucked it under the counter. "I'll be back in a few." Walking back into the kitchen I gave Marvel a wave. "Hey, when you can, help Rye behind the counter could you? I'll be right back." "Sure thing, Kat," he said with a nod. Then through the kitchen and out into the bar, I spotted Peeta sitting in a booth with his dad. Here goes everything.

"Hey," I say walking up beside the booth I slid into the open seat beside Eric, "Can I borrow Peeta for a moment, Eric?" He gave me a smile. "Cost you a kiss." Peeta stood up from his spot across the booth as I kissed Eric on the cheek before sliding out of the booth myself. "Thanks Eric, we need to spend some time together." "Lunch soon," he stated like we always did for our annual "family time." "Yeah," I smiled. Then taking Peeta by the hand I led him through the bar, into the kitchen and to the hall that led to the back room. "You okay," he asked, "You're shaking." "I'm shaking," I began only to look down to see my hands trembling. I nodded my head. "I have to tell you something," I began only to stop myself causing the hall to fall silent. "Hey," Peeta said rubbing him hands up and down my arms, "You can tell me anything you know, were in this together. Remember, always." I nodded my head again. "I- I know… I know about-" And then there was a tumultuous crash interrupting me as I talked. Pausing to hear what was going on there was another crash. Following my instinct, I pulled away from Peeta running through the kitchen and into the bar to see Cato's fist connecting with Marvel's stomach causing him to fall to the floor. What the hell was going on?

"Hey," I yelled pushing through the people whom had crowded around Cato and Marvel, "Move it!" And as Cato sauntered over toward Marvel who was struggling to stand up I pushed through the crowd stepping in front of him. "What hell are you doing Cato?" I say tall and sternly. "Nothing," he said through his teeth, clenching his fist, "Just step aside and in no time I'll be gone." Did he think I was going to let him beat the shit out of Marvel like he did with Shoe-Be Joe a few summers ago? He had to be stupid to think so. Opening my mouth to tell him to go, he grabbed my arm I assumed to push me aside, but the moment he touched me my knee came up in contact with his groin. "Ahhh," he groaned keeling over. Knowing it would take a few moments for him to recover I turned to Marvel to see Rye helping him off the ground and blood trickling down from the now cut under his now forming black and blue eye. "Get him cleaned up and then back to behind bar," I say to Rye before pointing to Marvel, "You stay in the kitchen and wait for me. We need to talk."

Back around, Cato was now standing as strong as he could be. Grabbing the front of his shirt I tugged him toward the front door. Once we were outside I let go of his shirt. "What the hell was that," I practically scream. He grunts pulling a cigarette from his pocket along with a lighter. "None of your business." "It became my business the moment you decided it was okay to beat up on one of my employees, _my friends_ in _my_ _bar_," I say taking the cigarette from his lips and stomping it out with my heel, "So what was that about?" "Nothing," he mumbles refusing to look me in the face. "Cato!" "He slept with Glim," he shouts at me, "My girl, he slept with my girl!" Taking in what he was saying I asked. "Glim? As in Daisy Glimmer?" "Yes!" "Cato, she sleeps around with everyone," I say, "And if you just beat the shit out of Marvel because she's a slut; and has been sleeping on and off with you, Marvel, Shawn, and god-knows-who-else and you were too stupid to see it then I gotta say I'm ashamed." Grumbling and grunting he asked, "How long?" "Um, three days," I say after a little hesitation, "And I'm being nice about this 'cause I kinda feel bad for you so don't complain." "Okay. That's fair," he nodded his head, "Three days, maybe I'll see you Wednesday then."

…

"Hey." I heard from behind me only to see Peeta's hands take the cases of beer from mine and set them neatly under the bar counter with the other cases. "You're good. The bars closed. Rye is gone. Marvels alive. Cato is on probation for three days. The bar is in tiptop shape. Let's take a break." I nod my head leaning against the counter. Pressing my palm to temple I say. "I still need to talk to you." Peeta smiles, "I'm here." "Okay," I say taking in a few deep breathes, "I know- know about the-" I stop myself thinking if I should go through with this, with telling Peeta about the ring. Is it still the right thing to do? I have no clue, but… "You know about what," Peeta presses. "The ring," I nearly shout, finally breaking, letting it all out, not knowing what all that is or what was with my emotional outburst. "I know about the engagement ring, Peeta! It fell out of your jacket that night of the hospital when you went to go get us coffee... It fell out and it was there and I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I know about the ring and the proposal... Don't kill Marcus, he told me about it all, he kinda… he had too. It was there. And it sounded wonderful, perfect..."

"Katniss," he says interrupting me, but I don't allow him too. I have hit my breaking point and everything that had been building in me for the last two weeks is now finally coming out. It was as if I had hit a point of no return, it was all being let out now. "Everything sounded, would have been perfect. The ring was gorgeous and- and the grand gesture was really romantic. But any proposal by you would result in the same answer… And I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, I didn't want to ruin it for you… I'm sorry…" By now tears have begun to cascade down my cheeks and in attempts of wiping them away with the back of my hand did no use. Peeta stood in front of me silent. He was breathing silently, shocked maybe. We stayed like this for what seemed like hours. But then watching as Peeta shoved his left hand into his back pocket pulling out the familiar black velvet box I had seen just weeks ago he set it down on the bar. "It's yours," he said. "Peeta-" But he cut me off. "No, it's yours Katniss, made for you, you should have it," he says backing up, "And- and… I guess I'll see you around." Then like that he was gone and it was just me.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

The Acquaintance

…

It has been four days since I had last seen Peeta, since we had… since we had broken up. He has not contacted me and neither had I to him. His stuff is still at my flat and mine at his. I'm not sure how this goes and truly have come to the conclusion that maybe if I do nothing maybe I can trick myself in thinking nothing has changed, that I was still in a relationship with Peeta. Nevertheless I hadn't gone by the bakery and had been avoiding it along with any other place Peeta could be found or associated with. Rye has not said much, his sexual and annoying side comments seemed to have run dry. Marcus has not called and either has Eric. It was beginning to scare me that I might have lost them when Peeta called things off and I didn't want to lose them, I didn't want to lose Peeta. Haymitch had called once which consisted of a lot of grunts and incomprehensible words. I had skipped out on our weekly dinner saying I was too busy. I have been avoiding Annie's yoga classes and texts. I had also been ignoring Finn's calls which I could only assume were made by Annie, Finn knew better than to call. Marvel has stayed out of my ordeals along witch Johanna and Gloss which I have become eternally thankful for yet they still tiptoe around me.

Right now I was seated behind the bar, well actually on top of the bar more like it. My butt on the corner counter and legs stretched out in front on me bent over the hand sink. It was Wednesday and I decided about a little more than an hour ago to close the bar for the night. It was a weekday so it wouldn't have been too crowded and it wouldn't be another week or two till I actually began to make some increasing amount of money; plus really I just didn't want to be around people at the moment. So after such a catastrophic decision, I had sent out a message to Rye and Marvel telling them not to come in and they respectfully didn't question it. So here I was at the bar. Me, myself, thee velvet box, and a brand new bottle of whiskey with my name on it. Oh what a Wednesday night! Taking a swig of the bottle I listened in on the soft music that was playing on the radio in the kitchen. It was soft and classy, comfortable and sadistic, sad and happy and somehow fit in with my mood just perfectly. As I hummed along with its soft melody I heard the door creak open and bang shut. "We're closed," I call out, "Be opened tomorrow." Adding in a "probably" under my breath. "But its Wednesday, Everdeen," I heard a voice respond, "I told you I'd probably stop by, didn't think I'd skip out on a drink, did you?"

Shaking my head, Cato took a seat along the bar close near my hip. "So about that drink?" I let out a breath taking a glass from off the counter and pouring some whisky into it before passing it too him. "Cheers." Clicking our glasses together we took a sip of our drinks. I must say it was nice. Cato wasn't being his usual ass self and me, I wasn't alone. Taking another swig from my bottle as I hummed along with the music I felt Cato's glass tap against my hip. "Hmm?" "So why are you drinking alone, Everdeen?" He asked raising his eyebrows at me. I shake my head at him swallowing a little more alcohol. "Oh it's a great story, really fantastic," I say feeling the alcohol talk, "Peeta was going to propose. I found out. Kept it to myself. Became a nervous wreck. Then thought it would be smart to tell him. Did. And guess what? He dumped me." I let out a laugh. "Well that explains the ring box," Cato states. I nod my head picking up the box and opening it to just have one glance at the ring, god it was perfect. "Sucks, too." "Only for him," Cato says, "He's missing out." I let out a laugh shutting the box and slipping it into my pocket. "Oh you have it bad." Cato joins in with my laughter, "Had to try at least." "Horny bastard." I muttered taking another swig from my bottle. "True though, you know? I'm not lying, it's his lost."

…

"What," I shout in frustration as I place the tray of dirty glasses into the bar's commercial dishwasher, "Just let it out already Rye, what?" He lets out a grunt turning to face me. "You really want to hear it Katniss?" "Yes," I say, "I want to know what I have done to deserved these dirty looks and silent remarks for the last week." "You've been a real bitch," he says pointing his finger at me. "I've been a real bitch," I say whipping the hand cloth off my shoulder down onto the table, "I haven't done shit." "You haven't done shit," he says raising his tone, "You completely ruined him. Here I thought everything was going great and then boom! You do whatever and he's a mess. You really broke him this time. And to make it even better you're hanging around town with Cato." "No," I shout stepping forward pushing against his chest, "You're brother walked out on me. I was being honest and he basically shitted in my face. And Cato, he's the only one who hasn't either been pissed off or too delicate with me." "Katniss-" But I cut him off, "No, out! I really don't want you around right now Rye; I don't want shit from you that I already got from myself. So just get out. Out now!" And so obediently bowing his head Rye made his way out the door and again it was just me.

…

Sitting at one of the corner tables at the Capitol I slid the pepper shaker between my hands waiting on the spinach, tomato, and provolone calzone I had ordered. Even this place reminded me of Peeta. God, I couldn't get him out of my head and truthfully didn't want to. I loved Peeta, but I guess he didn't love me the same to forgive me for not telling him sooner. Life sucked. Sliding the shaker back and forth, faster and faster the chair across from me was pulled out from under the table. Thus looking up, Cato sat done placing my calzone down in front of me and a panzerotti in front of himself. Then watching him oh so causally, he picked up the panzerotti and took a bit while in the meantime I couldn't help, but think how oddly fantastic this situation was. As he swallowed he asked pointing to the, my calzone, "Wrong order, did I pick someone else's up? I really hate when that happens." "No," I reply, "It's exactly what I ordered." "Loss of appetite? I know I can have that kind of effect on women? Don't feel ashamed," he says, "It's okay, you can admit it, no one will judge." Leaning my head back I finally let out the laughter that had been building in me the minute he sat down. "Oh, you are persistent aren't you?" He gave me a smile, flashing his sparkly whites. "I try."

Seeing there was no use in fighting him I gave in, leaning over and taking a bit of my calzone. "So," I say licking a bit of grease from my thumb, "What is this?" "This," he repeats waving his hand between himself and I. "Mh hmm, this." I agree. "Well this is me surprising you during your lunch," he says shrugging his shoulder, "That's just the face though; technically this is date number two." I lean into the table on my elbows intrigued to where this was going, "And when was date number one?" "Last Wednesday, we drank together, ate nachos, and you hummed along to that soft sadistically, gloomy opera type of music. And don't tell me that wasn't a date. There was the two of us- only us, music- entertainment, and nachos with some pretty bitter whiskey- food and drink." I laugh not bothering to reply. I had to admit, hating myself for it too, that it was nice seeing Cato around these past few days as he helped my thoughts of Peeta disappear for a few minutes, but they _always_ resurfaced. So as I take another bit of my food, Cato continues. "So this a little more than a week later, but not too much later that we've past the two week mark. Plus this is a casual so it doesn't look like I'm pushing it. And it's a surprise so I get brownie points for that."

Just shaking my head I couldn't contain my laughter. "As much as that does sounds… nice. I'm usually friends with one before I date them… Plus I just got out of a five year relationship." He smiled waggling his eyebrows up and down at me, "Oh so you are considering dating me Everdeen?" I send a glare his way only causing him to lean back in seat with a growing smirk forcing across his face. "Okay Everdeen, I won't push, I know Lover Boy screwed you over. But I must say I thought we were friends. I mean since you showed up here we had our moment. That time I kissed you and your friends beat me up. And then you saved my ass form getting kicked in jail the following year. That's when we started playing nice, I mean I even allowed you a free shot at my face after that… and you hit a little south. I thought we were friends though. I come to your bar, you serve me drinks, I pay and always tip, and every now and then I'll cause a ruckus to keep things interesting." "Mh hmm," I sighed, "Okay I suppose that's friends in your book, but in mine it's more like close acquaintances maybe." "Okay," he says nodding his head, "Acquaintances. I can deal with that. And since I'm not a friend we won't date, but since I'm an acquaintance we can do benefits still." "Ass," I muttered before taking another bit of my calzone. He smiled. "I know it's a perfect ten, but yours I'd say would be a high eleven."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

The Encounters

…

"Nice tattoo." The guy's whose name I had learned is James says. I nod my head politely, folding my shirt into my beach bag. And that's when Cato interjected. "What? Tattoo? You got a tattoo Everdeen?" "Yeah," I mumble, "A little while ago." At that response a cunningly, pleased smile grows across his lips. "Let's see it," he says. And so turning around I lift my arm the slightest bit revealing my tattoo and my scars. I don't like to look at it often, it remind me of Peeta and the mistake I made, but it was a permanent reminder I would have to live with. "Impressive," Cato says setting his hand at the top of my rib cage where the feathered fletchings is, "Never thought you were a tattoo type of girl." "Neither did I," I mumble to myself turning away from Cato's touch to lay down on my beach towel. Lying down I hear two voice say something about going down by the water whom I assume is James and Andrew as moments later Cato lays down beside my towel on his back on the sand. "Grumpy much?" He says causing me to shoot him a glare. "Cato, it's my day off and I haven't slept in the last six days and all I really want to do it just relax, and hopefully sleep for a couple hours."

He nods his head in acknowledgement. "Okay, sure," he says, "No problem." Rolling my eyes I'm nearly sure that won't happen, that in a matter of a few hours I would be up and around playing a game of football or frisbee with Cato and his frat brothers. So reluctantly shutting my eyes I focused on sleeping or at the very least finding a few hours of relaxation. And at the moment I was relaxed and I had to say it was nice. Feeling the warm sun glistening down on my skin and a soft breath blowing across my back I took it all in. As I lay there for several minutes, I twist and turn, shuffle and shift on my beach towel till I find myself in a comfortable position, my right toes buried in the warm sand, my left knee bent just a bit, and my left arm rested under my head along with my hair pulled back in a messy bun. It was perfect, nearly. Nevertheless as I lay there I couldn't seem to find myself unable to fall asleep as there was some sort of lingering annoyance or stillness in the air. Peeking my right eye open I saw Cato staring back at me with a childish grin on his lips. "Stop staring at me," I mumble shutting my eye. He grunts. "Grumpy."

…

No less than four hours later as I had expected I was no longer lying on my beach towel sleeping or even relaxing. James and I were picking snacks off the shelves of the local Gas 'n Go while Cato and Andrew were setting up the volleyball net back at the beach. I had left James wandering the isles after handing him a gallon of water and a couple granola bars to purchase at the cash register before going off on my own and leaving him to grab whatever food him and the guys would eat. Grabbing a pack of carrots from the refrigerated section I went to check out to inform Mr. Maloan I was not stealing the carrots and to charge James for them before heading out the door. And as I pushed against the front door, opening the bag of carrots in the process, I rammed into hard body taking us both to the ground. "Ahhh," I groaned planting my hands on the ground on either side of the person's body before pushing myself off their chest, "Shit, ahh, sorry I didn't see you. Sorry." Rambling on I finally get to my feet. Brushing whatever dirty and sand was on my legs and jean shorts off I swiftly adjust my bikini top to make sure I was covered; and note that I was good.

Then finally looking up I came to see Peeta lifting himself off the ground with my bag of carrots clutched in his hand. Oh no. Crap. Feeling my body go stiff and my brain shut down I stood there staring blankly at Peeta. Crap. Shit. Crap. Peeta, he was there right in front of me and god did he look good. His hair was a little longer than it was last time I had seen him and at the moment it looked as if he just run his hands through it. His eyes were still that sea of blue I could lose myself in. His shoulders and chest were sculpted perfectly under his t-shirt. God I missed him and not just _him_. I missed the way he made me feel, how I was around him, how we were. But I messed it all up so I had no right to complain. Nevertheless even though I missed Peeta, the one that stood in front of me was different. He looked tired and sad, a side of my Peeta I barely ever saw or never had the honor of coming accustom to. This had to be what Rye had been screaming at me about that night at the bar, this grayish film that had become a layer of Peeta's figure. I mean hell he was wearing a black t-shirt with a pair of dark basketball shorts; these were not the normal cheerful colors he usually wore like the blues and oranges.

"Hey Katniss," he says running his hand through his hair nervously. Crappp. "Hey," I say just as nervously, "Hey Peeta." "Hey," he repeats himself. Ummm, I think, what am I supposed to do now? "Oh, ahhh, here," he says handing out the bag of carrots in front of him towards me, "These are yours." "Thanks," I mumble taking the carrots from his hand. "Um, you want one?" He shakes his head no and I just nod in response. Then the air between us fell silent. Great, way to make things awkward Katniss. Slowly beginning to bounce up and down on the balls of my feet in anxiousness, I look around for a way out. And then I hear the customer bell ring causing me to turn to see James walking out the door with two plastic bags in hand along with my gallon of water. Turning to quickly take the gallon of water from James's hand I turn back to Peeta. "Hey, I gotta go." He nods his head. Then as I am walking away he calls out. "Katniss can we- sometime can we get together and talk about- about us." Shifting to look to him I want to say no cause I don't want to hurt him anymore, but instead I nod my head yes. "Um, sure. I'll- I'll stop by the bakery on Friday next week." Then he gave me a genuine smile, "Thank you."

…

Diving for the volleyball I tumble into the sand missing it by just a few inches. Dammit. "And we win," James and Andrew roar throwing their hands up in the air high-fiving one another, "Victory is ours!" Hooting and hollering they take the volleyball and make their way back toward where our beach towels are laid out. Still lying in the sand I roll over so I was lying on my back. Then unexpectedly out of nowhere, Cato dropped down on me landing on the palms of him hand like he was setting himself to do a push-up. Lowering himself closer down toward me so that our chests were nearly touching he gave me a smile. "You aren't claustrophobic are you?" "No," I say, "But can I ask why so close?" He gave me a devious looking smile. "Why? Am I making you uncomfortable?" Rolling my eyes I let out a snort. "Nope," I say popping the "p." "Good," he responds basically dropping all his body weight to he is lying on top of me. And god he was heavy. He was probably an inch or so taller than six feet and probably weighed over two hundred pounds.

"Lose some weight," I say in dramatic gasp, "Too heavy." "Hey," he says protest having his chest press against mine as he breathed in to talk, "I'm insulted. And for your information, I have zero percent body fat, Everdeen. It's _all_ muscle." Letting out another laugh I push against his shoulders thinking maybe I could get him to roll off me, but I'll restate, he was heavy. "So what do you want?" He gave me a cunningly smirk and a wink of the eye. "You know what?" "What do you want that's in reason Cato," I restate myself, "And if you say nothing then would you please for the love of god get off me before my rib cage collapses again under your _massive_ weigh." "Come get a drink with me," he says adding in, "And muscle weighs three times the amount of fat." "Righttt," I drag out, "And I'm not going to go get a drink at my own bar Cato, especially on my day off. Think of something else and in reason." He gave me a smile pushing himself off me so he was standing up. Then reaching his hand out in front of me I took it. "We'll get a drink," he reaffirms pulling me onto my feet.

…

"You bought the old firehouse," I say in amusement as we walk through the door, "How the hell did you get the money to buy this place? Brutus?" He let out a snort placing his keys into a bowl that sat on an end table close to the door. "You know I have a job right? I do make money? I do pay for myself and my things? I am independent twenty-three year old man." I look at him impressed. "Really? And what do you exactly do?" "Stocks, I trade," he says leading me down the hall and into the kitchen. "Shit!" I nearly shout before clamping my hand over my mouth looking at the size of his kitchen. It could have belonged to a restaurant. It was enormous. "Yeah I know it's kinda big, a little too much, but it came with the place. Beer?" "Yeah," I nod, hopping up onto the center table. Watching him open the refrigerator grabbing two beers I looked around. Connect to gigantic kitchen was a living room just as big with a flat screen, two couches, and a pool table. There were a few doorways which I assumed lead to some other rooms or maybe the garage with those poles the firefighters would slide down in emergencies.

Looking back, Cato stood in front of me holding out an open beer. "Thanks," I murmur taking the beer from his hands. As I take a swig of my beer, Cato took a swig of his own beer as he leaned back against the counter across from me. "So where are James and Andrew?" I ask intrigued as of why they didn't come back to the house with us. He laughed. "At your bar." I laughed too. "Oh god," I say, "Please tell me they're not like you, that they can be civil at times." He laughed even more pushing himself off the counter. "I'm not that bad," he says in protest, "And I am civil." I laugh setting down my beer, "The first time you came to the bar I had to have you thrown out." He grunts setting his beer down on the table beside mind before putting his hands up in surrender. "Okay, okay," he says, "Maybe I'm not always on my best behavior, but I can promise you James and Andrew won't cause a rumpus." "Rumpus," I laugh, "Nice vocabulary." He joins in on my laughter, "Hey, at least I try."

Continuing to laugh I don't realize how close Cato is till there is only inches separating us. When our laughter die the room falls silent. And then ever so slowly we begin to grow closer and closer. It isn't till just as my eyes are about to close that they see that blue, that sea of blue I will never be able to get from my mind that a familiar need, sense overcomes me. That's when our lips clash together. The action is rough and needy and not at all as I remember it being, not that slow burning flame that I was use too. The passion is different as if something changed. And that's when it clicks as Cato's tongue slithers into my mouth that I can't do this. Cato is not Peeta. I need Peeta, I love Peeta, and there is no one else. Pushing away from him I gasp for air. Shittt. Pulling at my hair, my brain goes into panic mode. "I can't do this," I say in a low tone as I fall from the table to my feet, "I'm sorry, I can't." "It's because of him," Cato's voice says from somewhere unknown, "Lover Boy?" I nod my head as I sling my bag over my shoulder and the tears had found their way down my cheeks. "I can't. He's- he's it. I screwed up and have to- have to live with it," I mumble, "I'm sorry I can't. You were- you're nice, really. A gentlemen. But I can't, not to you…" I trail on as I slowly back my way to the door. "I can't."


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

The Boys

…

"Put that beer down! Now!" I yell from the booth across the bar that I'm cleaning. I do not get what causes people to shove trash and popcorn into the booth cushions. After three years of this I have not come up with one plausible answer. I don't hear the refrigerator door open or the sound of glass hitting the wooden counter so again I shout out, "Put it down!" I hear Gale snort probably nearly spitting out his drink as Rory whines, "Com'on Katniss, just one." I turn to shoot him a glare, "You are under age Rory Williams Hawthrone. You are no allowed to drink, especially in my bar. You should be pleased that I'm even allowing you in here, especially allowing you behind the bar. So put it down." "But Katniss," he whines like a child, but I cut him off with another deathly glare causing him to shut up and set down the beer. Only if looks could kill. Continuing to clean I listen to make sure Rory doesn't pop open a beer because everyone knows Gale doesn't give a shit and will allow him to do whatever he want. Besides not caring if Rory drinks or do any of the crap that Gale and I did when we were his age, he's really a great older brother. Probably after another half an hour of cleaning I give in saying, "Let's go." Gale grunts taking his beer from the counter and following me to the door with Rory in tow.

Lights out and doors locked we make our way outside and up the steps to my flat. And even though its early June I am more than happy to be inside even if I was only outside for just a minute as the nights seem to be getting chilly. Inside the guys seem to halt moments after stepping inside. "Where are you sleeping," Rory ask. "Here." "Oh, okay," he says confused, "And us?" Crap, I think, why did they have to just show up? If they had given me some warning I could have thought something up, sent them to Haymitch's or Marvel's even. "Ah," I say making it up as I went along, "Gale you get the spare bedroom and Rye… you get the couch. And don't complain, I could have thought of something better if you had given me some warning you were coming." "Ahh," Rory groans, but without a word Gale walks over and plops himself down on the couch. "I'll take the couch, Rory," Gale says, "I won't fit on that twin bed." "Yes," Rory says a little more enthusiastic about the sleeping arrangement now than before. And as Rory makes his way down the hall to the guest bedroom he stops. "Hey, Katniss, why aren't you staying at Peeta's? I mean that's when happened last time we just showed up, you went there and we took over this place."

Crap. Um. What do I do? Lie. Yeah, lie. That'll work. "Um," I say not really sure what's going to come out of my mouth, "He has some stomach bug and… and for the last week has banned me from his place, kind of all contact with him actually. You know Peeta always… always being over precautious, doesn't want me to get sick… you know?" Rory gives me an odd look like he's confused on what I am talking about. "Oh," he says, "But we saw him on our way to the bar and he looked fi-" "Pretty gruesome," Gale interrupted before shooting Rory a look that I did not catch, but it made Rory change his mind instantly. "Yeah," Rory says, "He looked-" He trails on only to stop after a minute when Gale interrupts. "Go to bed Rory." So giving us each a polite nod goodnight Rory disappeared down the hall. Once I'm sure he is no longer is hearing distance I give Gale a smile, "Thanks." He turned one. "No problem, Catnip." Then kicking off his shoes and lying on his back he said, "Goodnight." "'Night," I replied before heading to my room. Gale and Rory knew something and I wasn't sure what and at the moment I had no urge to find out what or discus my love life with them. So I striped out of my clothes and crawled into my bed.

…

"I got one!" Rory yells. "No you don't," Gale and I call back in unison. And then a minute later, Rory mumbles to himself mostly likely not wanting us to hear, but at the same time not truly caring if we did, "No I don't." This has been going on for about the last several hours. Every time Rory has seen a ripple in the water or has felt the slightest tug on his line he had shouted, "I got one," and less than a minute he would mumble how he didn't have one. He wasn't that great at fishing, too impatient, but at least he was trying. Gale and I on the other hand had sat here in silence only saying a word when we would yell at Rory telling him to basically shut it cause he was scaring away all the fish. In addition we had caught a total of three fish between the two of us. Gale and I could sit and fish for hours in silence like we did on weekends back in the Seam when we went fishing in the river at the west end of town. Now feeling Gale nudge me with his elbow I looked to see him counting down the fingers on his right hand. And when his pinky when down he shifted in his seat causing the boat to barely shake and Rory to jolt up from his spot yelling, "I've got one!"

With a grin, Gale then stood up in an angrily manner. "Sit down asshat, no you don't." And as the end of Rory's line surfaced there was nothing, but the piece of chopped squid on his nook. Letting out a disappointed sigh he sat down onto the bench. "This sucks," he grumbled, "I don't get how you two enjoy this. Uh... I'm give up." So watching him place his fishing pole into one of boat's holders he then laid down across the bench on his back pulling his baseball cap over his face. "You're awful," I say in a low whisper to Gale as he retook his seat beside me. "No, I'm not," he said in protest, "I'm just playing big brother." "By tormenting your little brother?" I question. He nods. "Yeah. I mean I wouldn't be able to pull this off with Vick, that kid is too smart and I couldn't do a thing like that to Posy, she just too innocent and adorable, you know? But Rory, I can pull this shit with him. It's in the contract of brothering. Plus to my defense the kid should know better, on the drive down here I gave him a few pieces of laxative gum from Vick's Boy Scout packet and all he said was, "I think I drank too much." He had nothing to drink all day. He's just really stupid sometimes." Laughing I elbow Gale. "You're awful."

…

"Hey," I hear someone say into my ear in a soft tone causing me to jump banging my head against the top of the refrigerator. "Ahhh, fuckkk," I mutter clutching my hand to the back of my head, "Ah, god that hurt." Putting my head down and backing away from the refrigerator, I grab the bowl of red and green grapes before slamming the door shut. "Dam you Gale," I say placing the bowl on the counter, rubbing my skull. God it hurt. He let out a laugh reopening the refrigerator and grabbing one of the power drinks I had lined up along the inside of the door. Opening the bottle, he stood in front of me. "So why are you up?" "Couldn't sleep," I say sitting myself down on the kitchen floor with the bowl of grapes between my legs. "No shit, Sherlock," he says sitting beside me on the floor with his legs out in front of him, "What's the real reason you're up?" I shrug my shoulders not really sure why I was awake. Nightmares… Peeta… too much tea… Cato… shit… shit… and more shit.

Unable to decide I just shrug my shoulders again. Gale nodded not pressing any farther. So as I picked out the red grapes from the bowl popping them into my mouth, Gale drank Vitamin Boost or whatever it was called while every now and then snatching one or two three grapes from the bowl. Sitting there in silence Gale nudged me with his elbow, "I might go back." "To the Seam," I ask confused, "I thought you guys were going back tomorrow anyway." He shook his head. "I think I might do another tour." And at that moment my heart stopped a little. He was going back. Gale was thinking about going back to the marines. "When?" I ask not sure what else to say. It wasn't like I could talk him out of it; he was just as stubborn as I was. "End of summer maybe, early fall," he says, "I'm not sure, I'm still thinking about it." "And Madge," I ask knowing she was the only one who could change his mind. He pops another grape into his mouth. "I don't think she's too open to the idea, but she hasn't come out and said anything yet… You know after what happened last time."

I nod my head. I knew what happened last time. It happened about a year ago, just before he returned home for good. It had been after serving in the marines for about a little more than three years that Gale had been promoted again. I think it was First Sergeant, all I knew was he worked hard and moved up the ranks fast. Anyway he was being sent on some mission that still to today he is not allowed to discuss. But anyway, two weeks in they lost contact with base and a week following Gale along with the rest of his men were pronounced missing. It took a hit on all of us. Madge became more quite than usual and basically disconnected from society. Hazel was on edge whenever the phone rang and became a little too protective, afraid of what would happen if she let the boys out of the house. The kids weren't any better, especially Posy. Me, I kind of stopped eating. That really got Peeta, I'm pretty sure he thought I was going to die. And I'll admit there was a good chance as I probably lost twenty some pound. Well, Gale was missing for three months. I had to say the moment I received the phone call that he was alive was one of the happiest moments of my life.

"Yeah," I reply, "Madge will kill if you decide to drop off the grid again." Then without thinking I added, "Peeta too, he could deal with me last time." And the moment I had mentioned Peeta's name it was as if I had opened a doorway for Gale. "Right, Peeta," Gale said picking up a few grapes, "What's up between you two, Catnip?" I look down at the bowl, "I'm sure you know Gale by the way you cut of Rory a few nights ago." "Yeah," he said nodding, "We stopped by the bakery before coming to the bar. The moment we stepped in Peeta stepped out. Eric said something about a break up." "Yep," I say popping the "p." "Um, well," he says, "Want to elaborate?" "Not really. But I guess I'll share," I say taking in a deep breath, "You know how Peeta likes honesty and how he is when he feels like someone's lying to him." Gale nodded. "Okay," I continue, "Well, about month and a half ago we were going on a date when we got a call from Marcus telling us to get to the hospital. Well at some point in the night he gave me his jacket and… and well a ring box fell out." "He was going to propose?"

I nodded, "Yeah. And well you know how Peeta gets really… invested in things. So I thought it would be nice not to tell him I knew, I mean Marcus told me about this big gesture he had planned and I couldn't just ruin it. I thought he would propose in a day or two. But weeks went by and nothing. He didn't even hint at it. Basically I couldn't take it, the guilt. So I broke down and told him." I pause for a moment, taking a breath, preparing myself for what comes next. "I told him and he… and he gave me the ring and said, "I guess I'll see you around."" I felt tears escape my eye as Gale's arms wrapped around me, pulling me into his chest. "Screw him," Gale says rubbing his hand up and down my arm, "No, forget him." "I wish," I mutter against his chest, "But I can't and it's over and I kissed a guy and… it's all just screwed." He doesn't saying anything and I'm content with this silence as he rubs his hand up and down my arm. It isn't till, I'm not sure actually when, at some point that Rory comes into the kitchen and sits down beside me, resting his head on mine. "Are you guys having our annual five year pow-wow without me," he asks poking me in the side. "Yeah," I say, "You missed out on my love life." "Ah, we talked about that last time," he says sarcastically, "I would have suggested we talk about football or hockey." And at this I forget about Gale's and mine take and fall into an uncontrollable laughter.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

The Rain

…

"You sure? You got the place covered," I press Marvel who nods his head for the hundredth time annoyed. "Yes, for the love of god get out of here Katniss. The bar will be fine," he says exasperatedly, "Johanna is in the back. Finn and Annie are across the bar. Rye is on his way. And the Brute and Gloss are sitting here at the bar drinking. Nothing is going to happen. Go." "Get out of here, Brainless," Johanna yells from the back, "Stop stalling and go confront Bread Boy." I let out a breath and look to Cato who was seated at the bar. Since the kiss we shared, we still hung out and not much has changed. As Cato had said a few days ago when we were eating Chinese at his place, "If it doesn't work out with you and Lover Boy I'm going to shoot for benefits," to which I laughed at and took a bit of my egg roll. But now I'm not sure what will happen to Cato and I or even the rest of the group if things with Peeta don't go well or even if things do go well. He gave me a smile raising his beer to me, "Crossing my finger, benefits for the win." Letting out a laugh, I shake my head. "You sure," I say to Marvel one more time only to have him point to the door, holding back his anger as he said, "Get out of here, now!" "Okay, okay," I say in protest, "I'm going."

…

Pushing through the bakery door, I escape the serve down pour occurring outside. Pulling my hair band from the end of my braid, I ran my hand through my hair. Beeps of water trickled off of my skin. My white tank top clung to my body along with my skinny jeans. And the heels I was wearing had become a treacherous hell; it was as if I was skating on ice. The moment I stepped out the bar's front door, I stepped into a torrential down pour. I had wished someone at the bar would have told me it was raining or that I would have been smart enough to figure it out myself that it was by the number to jackets hanging by the door. I would have worn a jacket then or brought an umbrella with me. I know I could have gone back inside and grabbed one, but I knew I would only being delaying seeing Peeta by going back. Plus I really didn't want to hear it from everyone. So I made I run for it. Pulling at my cloths they only retracted to my skin, clinging on for dear life. This wasn't a good start. And as I pulled at my top, especially the top of my tank top where my blue bar had become visible underneath the white cotton I heard a grunt clearing the room. Then looking up, my eyes met Peeta's.

"Hey," I say quickly pulling my hands away from my clothing and to my sides. "Hey," he replies jumping over the bakery's counter. "Hey… um… you want to sit," he asked motioning to the old the leather couch that was still seated against the bakery's baby blue wall beside the old patched up, brown microfiber armchair and stained, oak coffee table. I shake my head no. "I'm good, I rather stand." "Okay," he says running his hand through his hair, "Hungry?" "Peeta," I plead, "Please?" He nods. "Sorry, um… I um…" He trails on. God, and he was supposed to be the one that was good with words. "Want do you _want _from me Peeta," I say cutting him off mid-sentence about something along the lines of shoes and paths and being in the same shoe on the same path or something. Yet the moment I cut him off he seems to snap out of it. He looks up at me in surprise with his mouth open. However it's only a matter of seconds that his facial expression goes from surprised to angry. "What do _I_ want," he says doing his best to control his emotions, "I want to know why_ you_ ended things between us."

Me? I ended it? Was he accusing me of ending things between us? Was I mistaken or was he the one that walked out? "Excuse me," I say stepping forward, "I wasn't the one the one that walked out." "And I wasn't the one that said no." He shot back immediately. Said no? Who? Me? I never said no. Where did he get that from? "When did I ever say no!?" "Since the beginning," he says in a tone that's just as heatedly as mine, "For the last five years you have been telling me how you never wanted to get married or have kids! And you _especially_ told me no a couple of weeks ago!" Shit you Peeta, shit you. "Yeah," I say pointing my finger at him, "For a good portion of the last five years I have said no. I never wanted to get married or kids because I didn't want to end up like my mother or my children end up like Prim and I. I never wanted anyone to go through what I have! But you know what? I fell for you Peeta. And the idea of having kids or getting married to you has become an idea I have started to become open to over the year or so; since with you things are better, manageable and maybe, just maybe I thought that things would be different, better if I married you or had your kids because you're perfect and loving and safe and in general just good."

I pause taking in a breath before continuing. "And a couple of weeks ago I never said no! I said sorry for being dishonest because I felt so bad for keeping that from you. But I love you Peeta, hell, I was going to say yes!" The moment those last words that escape my lips, Peeta becomes frozen in place. "You were- were going to- to say yes," he stutters out. God, did this boy think all those _I love you_'s were a joke or lie or something? "Yes," I say trying to make it as clear as possible, "Did you really think I wouldn't? I mean do you think I would have stayed with you this long if I didn't love? Did you think I was leading you? Do you think I would have stayed if there wasn't a chance of us getting married, a chance of us having kids, a chance of us having a future together? I do have a soul, a heart, Peeta. I'm not a complete bitch. I mean… God, I love you! I love you Peeta! And it still scares the crap out of me like it did the first time… But I still love you; I don't think I could stop myself from loving you. I want to be with you! 'Cause with you I am happy, complete, alive. To lose you would be- would be hell, I don't think words could describe it. Jesus, shit! Peeta I'm not good with words, you're the one that's good with words and I'm not really sure what else to say than I love you. I, Katniss Everdeen, love you, Peeta Mellark!"

My rant coming to a heaving halt I find myself attempting to catch my breath while waiting on a response from Peeta. Yet Peeta, Peeta stood there in front of me silent. He stood tall and silent not saying a word. Butts, I think, this was my worst nightmare. Peeta speechless was something I never found to be good. Thus waiting, standing there for a response, moments go by and yet he remains silent. Shaking my head I reached into my back pocket pulling out the velvet box. "I can't keep this if you don't want me. Reminds me of _us,_ of you too much," I say quietly slowly breaking on the inside as I spoke those words. Placing it on the coffee table I shook my head. "Sorry," I mumble as I felt the tears begin to prickle up at the brim of my eye lids, "I really am. But I guess… I guess this is us now and I hope that… that we can be friends." Turning I walk toward only to stop just before walking back into the down pour. "Always." I say not quite sure if Peeta heard me or not. Yet once I say it, I felt the tears trickle down my cheeks so pushing against the door I made my way into the storm.

I don't run through the rain like I did on my way to the bakery, but casually walk back toward the bar. I don't even walk on the sidewalk, but in the middle of the street not caring if a car comes rumbling by. Well, things didn't go as I hoped. No, let me restate that, things didn't go at all as I hoped. Screw you, life. Continuing to walk through the rain I feel myself go from wet to cold to numb to warm. The transformation and change of feeling is almost instant. It makes me question what I was doing out here, forgetting to feel? Stopping in my tracks I stand still in the middle of the street during a torrential down pour like an idiot. Then looking to the sky as if I would see stars, I see nothing but tumbling rain drops. And I stay like that for I'm not sure how long, seconds, maybe hours looking up into the rain. It isn't till I hear a voice calling in the distance that I snap out of it. And there turning I see Peeta running from the bakery entrance toward me. Dear god, I think, please, please let this good.

"Katniss," he calls growing closer, "I'm sorry for being an asshat, I'm sorry. I screwed up. And when I'm saying sorry. I'm not saying no, I'm apologizing… I love you Katniss and I'm sorry I was an idiot and just assumed you were saying no, blindly avoiding your true intentions… I love you more than anything and these last five years of my life have been the best. I want five more. Whatever I can get from you I'll take... You make me feel comfortable in the silence and happy with each smile. You are my better half and worst, but I don't care… " At this point I am smiling in happiness as Peeta kneels down on one knee with the ring box open in front of me. "I know were not perfect, that I'm not perfect. I know we fight. I know were messed up. But I love you. I love you and no matter how mad I will get at you for drenching your pancakes in syrup or you at me for adding sugar to my tea, my love, our love will never change… So here I am doing a not-so-grand-gesture of fireworks and food and that whole thing I had planned, but screw it. I love you Katniss and I want to marry you… Will you be my always?'

Looking down at Peeta I dramatically nod my head. "Yes." I make out, "Yes, always." And so standing up on front of me, Peeta took my left hand in his and slipped the ring onto my ring finger with his right hand. "It's beautiful, a perfect fit," I say with a smile. "You hadn't already tried it on," he asked and I shook my head. "Well, it's perfect just like you." Laughing I push my hand against his chest only causing him wrap his arms around my waist, drawing me close, "That, this is completely cliché... Girl and boy fight, there is an awkward silence where the really intense piano melody begins to play. Then girl runs into the pouring rain and boy chases after her into the middle of the street and then it is happily ever after." Peeta laughs too, "And I didn't even plan it out." Continuing to laugh together I wrap my arms around Peeta's neck. "But we forgot one thing," I say. "Oh," he says raising his eyebrows at me, "And what would that be?" "The kiss."


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

The Resolutions

…

"What now?" I ask as I lie curled up against Peeta's chest. He tightens his grip around my waist, "We move forward. We talk, I talk, you talk. _And_ we listen." "Okay," I say, "I can deal with that… Are we starting now?" "Um, sure," Peeta goes along, "You first." "You need to shave. You are far past the sexy-five o'clock-shadow look." "What, really," he whines palming his almost beard, "I thought I had something going with the uncontrollable hair and grizzly look." I laugh leaning my head against his chest. "I'm sorry, but no, it has to go." "Ahh, fine," he groans before kissing the top of my head, "But I will, only for you." Letting out another laugh, I mumble a thank you into his chest. "And you," he begins with a type of giddiness in his voice, "You have to wear those heels more often." "No, no, no," I say, "Hell no." "Hey," he says in protest we, "We agreed to talk and listen and agree." "There was nothing about agreeing," I say looking up at him. Yet it is a mistake as I look up, he gave me one of his sappy puppy dog looks saying, "But they make your legs look so long and _sexy_." And unable to say no, I let out a groan plopping my head back down on his chest. "Only on certain occasions will you see me in those heels… maybe."

"Like at our wedding," he ask. And just like that, it hits me like a ton of bricks that I am going to marry Peeta at some point. I may not be marrying him tomorrow, but at some point in my future I will. I'm not opposed to the idea, but it seems to just have become fully aware in my mind that by accepting his engagement ring and saying yes that one day I will marry him. And then even more so it hits me that I have to tell him about Cato and I, that one meaningless kiss we shared. "Peeta," I say in a low whisper, "I have to tell you something and you have to listen. And to not get too mad, please." "Okay." Snuggling my face into the crook of his neck I hid away. "After our break, I began to hang out with Cato. And don't judge, he's not that bad. But-" I begin only pausing to take in a deep breath. Com'on Katniss, I tell myself, you can do this, Peeta agreed to hear you out so tell him the truth and nothing can go wrong. "But one day we were hanging out we kinda- we kissed," I say quickly, "It didn't mean anything, you have to understand that. It wasn't right, I couldn't do it and that doesn't mean he forced himself on me. It just wasn't right because… because it wasn't you. I'm sorry, I really am. And I'm telling you this cause you deserve to know, but you have to know you stopped it, I couldn't, wouldn't ever, never do anything like that cause I love you."

We continue to lay there for a few moments in silence and I'll have to say the silence scares me. Peeta's silence always seems to scare me. His silence is some of his loudest spoken words. However, the moment I feel Peeta begin to rub circles up and down my back a sense of reassurance washes over me. "Thanks," he says slowly before continuing in a soft tone, "Thank you for telling me that... I un- understand what you're saying and it doesn't make me the most thrilled person alive, but I'm okay, it's manageable... Just note that I'm not saying the next time I see Cato that I might not take a swing at him." Letting out a sigh of laughter, I nuzzle me head deeper into the crook of his neck. "No "swinging." No fighting. No anything. I don't feel like having to nurse you back to life." "_Nurse_ me back to life," he questioned, "You don't think I could take him? I mean, come on." "Ehhh," I say, "You're a few inches shorter than him and he has to have fifty some pounds on you plus you know I'm not pro-fighting type... And he kinda a friend now so you two "swinging it out" wouldn't be so fantastic." Peeta let out a groan. "Only for you, but if tries to pull anything I'm not going to let it slid."

…

Sitting on the counter in the back of the bakery, I chew on my cheese bun as Peeta talked to customers out in the front room. This is nice, I think, I missed this. Being with, back with, Peeta was nice. I missed these mornings and nights like the last where we were just… just us basically. I liked how everything felt right, in place. Smiling to myself I pop another piece of my cheese bun into my mouth. God these things are, I think, I've missed these too. Then as I hear the bakery's back door open followed by a loud squeal, I feel Annie squeezing the life out of me. For a small, petit girl she knew how to hug. "You two are back together," she screams, "Oh this is great! This is fantastic!" "Annie… air," I breathe out. "Oh, right, sorry," she mutters letting go of me. Sucking in a few deep breaths I look in front of me where she stands and give her a smile. Was she on steroids of something? I mean really, the girl did yoga, but hugged like she was a body builder. "So you two worked things out and everything back to normal? Right? Please say yes… pleaseee say yes." I nod my head popping another piece of the bun into my mouth, "Yeah, we're back together. We're working things out, we're all good."

As I was lowering my hand back down to my lap where the remainder of my cheese bun rested in my right hand, she reached out and grasped my wrist stopping it midway. "What- is- _that_?" She breaths out. "What," I question having no clue what she's talking about. "That," she repeated. "What," I restated causing her to give me a looked that said as-if-you-don't-know. "_That_," she says, her eyes fixed on and left pointer finger pointed at Peeta's engagement ring around my left ring finger. "Um," I drag out not sure what to say, "Umm." "Katniss Everdeen! Is that an engagement ring!? Did Peeta Mellark finally propose to you!? And you said yes!? Are you getting married!? And you didn't tell me!?" "Um," I said again not really knowing how to answer. Then looking around the kitchen as if someone was hiding from her she screamed, "PEETA! FIRE!" And then no more than two seconds following Peeta burst through the door. "Where!?" He yelled taking the fire extinguisher off the wall beside the door. As he looked around the room, pointing the extinguishers nozzle at everything he looked at I said, "Peet, there's no fire. Annie's being… I don't know really, put down the extinguisher."

Setting the fire extinguisher back on the wall hanger, Peeta turned to Annie. "You can't yell fire," he shunned, "You caused our customer to basically run out screaming and nearly gave me a heart attack. _God_. You can only yell fire if there is a legit fire, Annie!" Looking to Peeta she raised up my hand waving it around. "You two are getting married!?" "Yes," he said, "Thus the ring. Now Annie-" But she cut him off. "Oh no, you can't just past this off like it's no big deal," she said, "You two are getting _fucking_ married!" They in unison Peeta and I yelled, "Annie, language." "Sorry, sorry. Right, bakery rules, no cussing," she mumbled before going on, "I mean come on; this is a big deal guys. Peeta I know you think it is cause you look happy as a freakin' peach by the way you look at her with that ring on her finger and Katniss, I'm not sure how you feels, but this is a big deal. Does anyone beside me know?" Quietly shaking my head Peeta said, "I was going to come back here once everyone left to talk to _my fiancé_ about that." "And your plan," Annie pressed. "Have everyone over my dad's place to announce it." "Good," Annie said with a smile, "We're throwing an engagement party."

…

Gripping my arm around Peeta's waist I lift my right foot and fix the strap of the heels Annie had made me wear. "You okay," he whispers in my ear as I stand back up beside him. I'm not sure if he's talking about the hellous heels or the white sundress or the mass amount of people standing in the back of yard of the Mellark home. Whatever he is asking if I'm okay about I just nod my head. But really I'm not okay, the heels were killing me and I was pretty sure I had lost feeling in my toes, the white sundress kept making me think that people could see my panties, and the mass number of people crowded around us were just scaring the shit out of me, there weren't that many of them either really. Feeling Peeta rub his hand up and down my arm he allows me to know that he knows that I'm a nervous wreck, but reassures me that everything will be just fine because he is there. Knowing I should trust him, I am still having second thoughts on about the entire night. I don't like people, I don't like public speaking, this is just about my worst nightmare. I mean as a bartender I talk to people, but their usually at least half drunk out of their minds. I wasn't really pro-engagement-party, but pro-mass-text-message yet I got wrapped up in the situation and agreed.

"You ready," Peeta says in my ear as he leans down giving me a kiss on my temple. I nod my head giving Peeta a soft kiss on the lips in return as a sign of reassurance. "As I'll ever be." Giving me a hopeful smile, I catch a flicker of joy… happiness… pride… extreme bliss in his eye as he looks to me. So returning the smile, I nuzzle myself as close as possible into Peeta's side. "Hey," Peeta calls out to the group of people, "Hey everyone! Could you all be silent for a moment, please? We have something to tell everyone!" Then automatically, the group dies down into a scarce silence. This is it, I tell myself, you're telling everyone you're going to marry Peeta. This is a huge step in life. You're engaged. You're getting married. This is huge. Standing there in silence I hear Gloss's voice ring through the group. "Oh shit, Katniss you're pregnant." Shooting him a glare I say, "Gloss, shut it. I'm not pregnant." "Mh hmm, sure. Hormones," Gloss mutters obnoxiously loudly, "She's pregnant." "Dammit, Gloss, I'm not pregnant. If I was I wouldn't be drinking this beer," I say at a reasonable loud tone, "Peeta and I are getting married." And then moment the words leave my mouth the group falls more silent than they stood before. There is a moment of silence in which Peeta grips onto me for dear life before everyone breaks into applauds. Letting out a breath I did not know I was holding, one by one people began to come to come up.

"Congrats," Marcus says in my ear as he pulls me into a hug, "Told you everything would work out." "Yeah, but you forgot to mention all the shit that would have to happen first," I whisper back before pulling away from him. He laughs stepping aside for his father to greet us. "Congratulations," Eric says to us before looking to me, "Finally get a daughter that I can spoil to death." I laugh, "Eric, you spoil me enough." "_Sure_," He laughed giving me a quick hug. "Lunch soon?" I nod greeting the next person behind Eric. "Sooo you're not pregnant," Finn says with a smile. "Shut it," I say playfully pushing against his chest. Yet giving me a smile he says, "Well congrats Kitty." Next is Rye accompanied with Clove who gives me a polite smile before Rye picks me up and spins me around. Many other come up, Gloss, Johanna, Seeder, Chaff, Mags, and even Cato. Finally Haymitch made his way up. Giving me a smile he wrapped his arms around my shoulders pulling me into a hug, "Not going to forget about me, right sweetheart?" I shake my head. "Never." Kissing me on the forehead he pulled away and looked to Peeta. "This isn't the first nor the last time you get this talk boy," he says pointing, "But you screw with her, I won't take it. I know she can take care of herself, but you'll hear from me." And letting out a stiff laugh Peeta shook Haymitch's, "Good to be officially part of the family." "Congratulations kids."


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

The Lunch

…

"I got to go," I say pulling away from Peeta. "Nooo-" He whines pulling me back onto the couch so I was again sitting on his lap. "Peeta," I say pushing myself off his lap and onto my feet, "I have to go or I'm going to be late for my lunch with your dad." "Be late then," he said pulling me back down onto him, "He can wait." "Peeta-"I begin yet don't get to finish my sentence as his lips clash with mine. The kiss is passionate and fierce. It's a spark adrenaline, of life. Moving together, we are a perfect fit. Peeta and I, yin and yang. As Peeta moves his hands from around my waist up to the sides of my rib cage he deepens the kiss. The he bites on my lower lip, I let out a gasp or a moan not knowing what escapes my mouth, but that it causes Peeta to smile. Knowing if I don't stop this kiss now, I won't be able to in a couple of more minutes. "Peeta," I say in between our kisses as he makes his away from my lips and along my jaw, "I- have- to- go-" Giving him one last kiss on the lips I pull away till I'm up and out of his reach. Then as I grab my bag I make my way to the door. "Katnisssss." I smile, giving him a wave as I reach the door. "Love you."

…

Walking through the front door of the Mellark home, there is a soft jazz playing and a scent of vanilla in the air. It's exactly how one would think home to be like. I shut the door behind me and make my way through the halls, past the family portraits and pre-school finger paintings. As I entered the kitchen, as expected stood Eric behind the kitchen island facing the stove, back to me. Examining the food spread raging from onions and garlic, asparagus, elbow macaroni, shredded cheeses, and a roll of bread I find myself completely baffled about what we are going to cook. Whatever were making, I think, it's bound to be delicious though. So setting my bag on one of the islands bar stools, I walked around it to stand beside him. "Hi Eric," I say, "Sorry I'm late." He nods his head, placing a couple pots and pans on top of the stove. "Hey Katniss." I nod my head, "So how are you?" "Good," he says with a smile, "I can't complain. Marcus is back to good health, Rye is not in trouble of any sort, and you are marrying my Peeta. Life is good… Are you ready to cook?" I nod. "What are we making?" "Grilled asparagus and baked macaroni and cheese," he says, "It was one of the few dishes Gertrude and I could ever agree on cooking."

I smile at how Eric brings goodness out of that woman. Eric and Mrs. Mellark, Gertrude, got a divorce three years ago. Supposedly she was never really that nice of a woman. I wasn't the first person she had verbally slashed out on. She was a miserable woman. Marcus had told me is started after Peeta was born. She wanted to have a girl, but instead got Peeta. He was her last chance and she blamed him for never having a daughter. And sadly it didn't stop there. From the bits and pieces of information I have collected over the years I'm surprised Eric hadn't left her sooner. She was never that supportive of Eric taking on the family business, the bakery. She wanted to get out of Naval Cove and held it against Eric for her staying. She was "always a bitch" to Peeta as Rye put it. She had higher standards with him than the twin and never seemed to acknowledge him; it took a hit of his self-esteem. In addition, she was never… kind to most people who associated with the family. She had slashed out on not only me, but Clove, Gloss, Annie, Chaff and Seeder, Haymitch, and numerous others. Overall she wasn't a good wife, mother, or human being in general.

Yet none of this seemed to tip the iceberg for Eric. It wasn't till things got too out of hand that things changed. It was till the summer before Peeta's sophomore year of college that Eric finally broke and the marriage fell apart. Peeta decide to transfer to a university in New York where he was going to major in business and minor in art. That didn't go well with Mrs. Mellark. She ranted, only ending up hitting him with a rolling pin. She broke his collar bone. Eric saw and broke everything off. Peeta said it the first and only time he had ever seen him mad. The next day Mrs. Mellark was gone. The six months later their divorce was finalized. Mrs. Mellark took the little money she had gotten out of the divorce and moved to god-know-where. No one has heard from her since and as far as I know, no one what to hear from her. Giving me a smile, Eric nudges me with his elbow. "It's one of Peeta's favorites too." "Really," I say kind of surprised. "Yeah, well at least half of the meal he enjoys," Eric said nodding his head, "He was a huge mac-and-cheese growing up. I'm pretty sure there was a year where he basically just ate mac-and-cheese with hot dogs for every mean." Letting out a laugh, I answer Eric's previous question. "I'm ready to cook."

…

A little more than an hour later, Eric and I are seated around the kitchen's island eating grilled asparagus with baked macaroni and cheese. This of all the lunches Eric and I have cooked together had to be the most successful. There had only been one injury when I had sliced my finger cutting up the garlic and onions. Plus to make up for accidentally cutting myself, none of the food had been burnt or destroyed in anyway. Smiling to myself I take another bite of my asparagus. "So," Eric says, "How are things with Peeta, the boy doesn't tell me anything?" I let out a surprised laugh, "Really?" He nods. Wow, I think. Peeta tells his father everything, they're like best friends, but I suppose this was something he wanted to keep between us. This was our thing now, our life, our problems, us. Since being broken up for a little than a month followed by getting engaged, some people have been talking about how long it would be till Peeta would break up again. We were the talk of the town. The stares and soft whispers were something I have become use to. But Eric was just Eric, a concerned yet loving father. "We're good," really I say, "We're figuring out where we go from here, but were good. Everything normal and things are just better."

Eric smiled taking another bite of his macaroni. "That's good," he says pausing as if he is thinking about what he is going to say next, "Have you guys started planning the wedding?" What? "Huh?" "The wedding," he says, "Have you guys picked a date or thought of anywhere you would like to have it?" Shit, I think, the wedding. "Um- we haven't- we haven't talked about it much," I say in broken up phrases, "It just- we haven't gotten to it- been figuring out where we stand-" God, I was engaged and haven't even thought of the wedding really. Peeta hadn't even brought it up in conversation. What kind of bride was I? Shouldn't I have bridezilla in like the twenty-four hours following the engagement? Mind reeling I feel Eric tap the top of my hand with his hand. "Hey," he says bring me away from my thoughts, "I was just asking Katniss. You guys don't have to get married right now, you can wait a year or so, you could be one of those couples who just stay engaged and never get married. I just figured I would ask." I nod my head. "Right." There is a moment of awkwardness, but it quickly passes as we both return to eating out food and talking of the upcoming fishing tournament, remembering the first year I had entered with Haymitch and was awarded.

…

Closing the door to Peeta's apartment behind me, I turn to see him sitting on the living room floor with his laptop open, a spread of papers beside him, and the record player playing some fifty cent album we had picked up at some shifty shop in New York during one of my visits up there. "Hey," he said with a smile looking up from his work at me. "Hey," I return the smile, "How's it going?" He let an obnoxious groan leaning his head back. "I hate bills and paper work. And receipts! They're the worse. What is their purpose!?" Laughing I say, "It all so you don't have the government come after you." "Still sucks," he mutters. "Sorry," I say with a smile on my lips, "Would some baked macaroni and cheese make it all better?" And at that his face lit up into a broad smile. It was if he was five year olds again. "My father's baked macaroni and cheese?" I nod my head. "Yes!" He shouts. Laughing again, I set my bag beside the door and take the platter of baked macaroni and asparagus in hand. "Okay," I smile, "Let me go heat it up." And as I walk into the kitchen I hear him shout, "Yes! Macaroni!" Attempting to stifle my laughter I am unable to. So quickly placing the platter into the microwave for a minute I grab two forks from the drying rack and a bottle of water from the refrigerator before microwave beeps telling me it has completed its job.

Back in the living room, Peeta had stacked his papers and laptop into a neat pile, making room for me to sit beside him. So sitting down crossed legged beside him, I place the platter on top of my legs. Watching him go straight for the macaroni, I go for the asparagus. God, it was good. Chewing I say, "Your dad said this was your favorite as a kid." He nods between bites saying. "Oh yeah, I'm pretty sure from the age of six to seven that was basically lived off of macaroni." Briefly letting out a snort, we then fall into a silence, the only sound possibly heard is the chewing of food. And then breaking the silence I say, "Peeta, we're getting married." "Yeah," he says nodding his head, "Why?" I gulp. "That means we have to plan a wedding." "Yeahhh," he drags out unsure what I am saying. "Peeta, how the hell do we plan a wedding?" "Don't know. It'll just happen," he says intertwining his fingers with mine, "We'll make it through." I nod believing every word he says. We can plan a wedding. "Do you want it to be a big, white wedding or something small," he asks. "Small," I say, "Definitely small." He gives me a smile. "I agree, something small, close friends and family… So we'll have a small wedding then," he says, "See, we just made a decision on something dealing with planning a wedding." Shaking my head I smile at his cleverness. "I suppose we can plan a wedding."


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

The Plans

…

"Sweetheart-" "No," I say automatically without letting him finish his sentence. This man just doesn't give up, I think. Propping myself up on my elbows to look at him over the couch I continue, "No, no, no." "Com'on sweetheart." I shake my head. What in god's name possessed this man to start a relationship with that woman? I mean no offense, but they didn't seem like two people that would be in a relationship, I'm sorry "friends" as Haymitch called it, together. "Haymitch I am not letting that _women _pick out my wedding dress." "Sweetheart," he said as he took the chicken out of the oven, "She wouldn't be _picking out_ the dress, just _helping_ you pick out the dress." Standing up I make my way around the couch and to the counter. "No, Haymitch," I say sitting down, "I am not allowing her to have any part in this wedding expect to attend." "Katniss-" He begins but I cut him off. "Haymitch if I allow her to have any say she will take over and you know it. And I refuse to wear some white, frilly, bedazzled wedding dress." Then giving me the look he gives me when he wants another beer when he has reached his limit I shake my head. "I will only go so far for you and allowing Effie Trinket to even attend my wedding is the most I'll do."

He lets out a groan of frustration turning away from me to the counter behind him to grab the bowl of rice I had found him cooking when I first walked in. Haymitch cooking was rare as me wearing a dress, but I had to confess it was nice to have him cooking for our weekly meals for a change 'cause: 1) He was kind of a better cook than me. 2) I didn't have to cook. 3) He couldn't complain about the food without me throwing it back in his face that he was the one that cooked it. Then watching him set the bowl on the counter beside the chicken, he handed me a plate with a pair of utensils. "How about bridesmaid?" Rolling my eyes I shook my head. "Don't make me take back what I said about allowing her to come to the wedding because I will Haymitch, don't tempt me." And knowing there was a chance I would, he shut it. Yes, I thought, victory. Smiling to myself, Haymitch shuffled around the kitchen collecting a plate and a set of utensils for himself. Then setting those on the counter he grabbed to beers from the refrigerator before taking his place across from me. And as I reached for a piece of chicken I heard him mutter under his breath. "Careful, you don't know what I put in there." I laughed. "I've survived my own cooking, I sure I'll triumph over yours." Letting out a grunt he rolled his eyes. "Shut up and eat your food."

I laugh taking a bite of my chicken. It has been a little more than two week since Peeta and I announced that we were engaged. Since then we planned out the wedding. It was going to be simple. It was going to be a small, laid back wedding. Formal-causal wear and all. There was going to be a maximum of mostly fifty, sixty people about. We were going to have the wedding during the last week of the summer so Gale could attend as in the fall he would be returning to the marines to do another tour sometime in the early fall. We were going to have it at Haymitch's. Have a small ceremony on the dunes and then go back to the Haymitch's for the reception. Father Claudius had agreed to do the ceremony. Haymitch was going to walk me down the aisle. Marcus and Rye were going to Peeta's groomsmen. Annie and Johanna were going to be my bridesmaids. Eric was going to do all the catering, he was going to make several different dishes and have it as a buffet sort of style. Marvel was going to be in charge of music as he took care of the music at the bar on weekends during the summer months. It was going to be simple, perfect. Looking up, I give Haymitch a smile. "I love you." Haymitch looks up from his own meals and returns the smile. "I love you too sweetheart."

…

I take a few steps away from the stove and look across the table in an attempt to read the list Peeta is writing out on one the college lined paper pads I kept in the kitchen for writing short messages and reminders. "Peeta," I say turning back to the stove, afraid that our food could catch fire any moment. Mixing the eggs and flipping the pancakes I continue to talk, "What are you doing?" "Writing out our plans for the wedding," he says pushing the pad of paper across the table towards me, "Take a look." So picking up the pad I begin to read Peeta's scribbles…

WEDDING

Date- August 31th

Place- Haymitch's

Dinner- Dad + help…

Cake- Me

Music- Marvel

Bar- Johanna? Collin?

Decorations- Annie & Effie?

Guest- 48? + - 1 or 2?

Wedding Party-

Annie, Johanna, Madge?

Finn & Brothers

Suites- College Grad Suit?

Dress- Effie? Cinna? City?

HONEYMOON?

LIVING AREA?

"Wow," I say setting the pad back down on the table, "This is everything." He nodded his head as he stood up from his seat at the table. Walking over toward me he opened the cabinet beside the refrigerator, pulling out two mugs and the box of tea bags. Then taking the kettle from the stove he poured the steaming water into both cups followed by dropping a tea bag into each. Dunking the tea bags up and out into the water I turned my attention back to the stove, quickly turning off the burners I flipped the pancakes onto one plate and then scrapped the scrambled eggs out of the other pan into a bowl. Then transferring our food from the counter to the table we take our seats finally ready to eat breakfast.

As I take two spoonfuls of eggs from the bowl I had poured them into from the pan, Peeta takes four pancakes off the platter of pancakes. Then we reverse, Peeta taking a spoonful of eggs and I two pancakes still leaving us with enough food left over for seconds. So sitting silence for a moment, I watch as Peeta adds two spoonfuls of sugar to his tea before asking, "So were done planning the wedding? Now we just follow through with it all?" He shook his head, looking up to me. "Honeymoon? Living arrangement," he says, "You did read the last part to it, right?" I nod my head. "I mean all wedding related topics have been taken care of." "Honeymoon? Living arrangement," he repeats. Yes, I think, I heard you the first time. Just nodding my head, I turn my attention to my platter. Falling back into a familiar silence, I can't help but think that once Peeta and I are married, we will be living together. We won't be switching from living at ones apartment four days a week and the others the rest of the week, but one place all the time. God, getting engaged involved a lot: talking, listening, marriage, living together, and getting the crap bugged out of you by everyone possible.

Swallowing the piece of pancake I was chewing, I nudge Peeta's kneecap with my foot under the table. I say the first that came into my mind. "District 12." He looked up from his eggs with a confused expression. "Honeymoon? You said it was on the list, the ones that we need to figure out what we're going to do about. For the honeymoon we could go there," I explain, "We always talked about going hiking and camping. You said you always wanted to do it, that you haven't done it since you were a kid and I haven't done it in years. You always talk about taking some nature shots and doing some sketches, too. Plus we could use some fresh air, watch some sunsets, whatever. We could go to that part of that mountain range up north Marvel had gone to last summer. It was called District 12, right? You know, where he camped out for a week in a cabin he rented with those college friends of his. It looked nice. He showed us all those pictures of that waterfall and that meadow and those old mines." Knowing what I was talking about his face grew into a broad smile. "That sounds perfect," he said, "I'll ask him for information on the place.

I smile to myself as I watch Peeta scribble something down onto the notepad. Turning back to my eggs and pancakes I think I got Peeta distracted enough to oversee the situation involving our future living arrangement, but it's only a matter of seconds after I hear him set down his pen that I feel his middle finger tapping the top of my hand. "Living arrangement?" I look from my food to him to my tea and back. I shake my head. "Not now." He watches me raising his eyebrows. "Do you not want to live with me?" Did he just- "Peeta," I say setting down my fork, giving him my full attention, "I want to just… Can we just not talk about this right now? I do, I want to Peeta. It's just- just this past week has been much... Back together… Engaged... Wedding plans… Can we just calm down, take a week off and just be us. I promise I want to live together, get married, it all. I love you Peeta, I just… Everything's just sinking in. Give me a week, after our trip to the city to do dress shopping, to let it all settle. Please." He nodded his head saying, "Okay," before turning his attention back to his food. Crap, I think, way to make him doubt you. Gulping I rub my foot against his ankle. "If you really like my opinion though, I'm pro-your place."


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

The Confrontation

…

Coming to a stop just after the sixth street jetty I lean over, resting my hands on my knees. In. Out. Breath. In. Out. I continue to tell myself this, gripping my knees tight. Leaning over, I lift my head as I feel the soft ocean breeze blow across the beach. And I can't help, but smile. God, that felt good. I should do that more often. I felt alive, rejuvenated as Annie would have said. I just felt good, like I had needed it. It has been weeks since I had gone running, I probably haven't run this Peeta and I had broken up. But today was different. I ran. This morning when I woke up at five, I don't know what came over me, but I just felt like running. I had the need for fresh air, for open grounds. I need to let loose and just… run. So I threw on a pair of running short, laced up my shoes and went for a run. I ran the island, what I normally ran when I went running. I started along the south end of the bay and circled around to the north point of the island and then along the beach back toward where I started. I ran by Captain Robinson and Valerie's. I ran by Annie's yoga class and by two kids fishing in the cove. I ran five, six miles. It felt great, fantastic. I felt as if I could go run another six miles. Standing up straight, I lifted my arms over my head. Breath. In. Out. In. Out.

As I gain control of my breathing, I turn to look at the ocean. The sun has risen and the day has begun. Back closer to the main, center of town I had spotted some people already beginning to make their way onto the sand. I couldn't be later than seven and people were already ready to start their day. Smiling to myself, I begin to hum along to the song my playlist just switched to. _If I could wake my crooked heart… If I was there right from the start… To feel what it was like to be turned on…_ Continuing to hum along, I nearly let out a shriek as I feel a hand rest on my shoulder. Yet instead of letting out a shriek, I push the hand off my shoulder as I quickly turn to connect my fist with the lower chest cavity of my assailant only to have my fist grasp by the wrist enabling me from hitting the person. Fully turning around I wriggle my wrist from the person's grip, taking a step away from them before looking up to see who had actually grabbed my shoulder. And looking around I came face to face with Cato. Cato. Thank god it wasn't a creep, I think. Pulling my ear-buds out of my ears I tucked them under my armband. Then ringing my hands together I look to Cato giving him an uneasy smile. "Hey, sorry about that… You kinda just came- came up and freaked me out… I- sorry."

He nodded his head. "It's fine, should have thought it wasn't the best of ideas of come up behind you like that. Should've thought you would throw a punch." I nod, ringing my hand tighter together as we fell silent. Well this isn't awkward at all, I think, not awkward at all. And so standing there, Cato and I stare at one another in a pregnant silence. I haven't talked to Cato in nearly two weeks, not since the engagement party. And even then things were weird. He didn't make eye contact with me that night and said no more than congrats. I just supposed after Peeta and I had gotten back together that things between Cato and weren't just going to work out. Continuing to stand there in silence I say, "So…" And seeming to catch my drift Cato seems to snap out of it, remembering why he was here. "Oh, sorry," he said, "I was down at my house and saw you running. Figured I'd come cover. I was wonder if you wanted to go back to my place and talk. We haven't seen each other in a bit. I got some food in the frig and shit if that sounds appealing." Not knowing what to say I blurt out, "Just ran six-some miles for the first time in weeks, I don't think eating would be the best idea at the moment." He nodded his head, "A water maybe?"

…

Sitting on one of the bar stools along Cato's kitchen counter, he opened the refrigerator door grabbing something off of the bottom shelf. Then he shuts the door, turning around to hand me a bottled water. "Thanks," I mumble, twisting the cap off the bottle and taking a quick swig. "No problem," he replies before turning his back to me. He faced the kitchen wall where his toaster sat beside the kitchen's stove. He was waiting on the bagel he had popped in the toaster moments ago to pop back out. Neither of us said a word. Awkward. Cato stood waiting on his bagel and I sat there not knowing what to do with myself. This is awkward. After agreeing to hang out, we walked the few blocks back along the beach to Cato's place in silence. Awkward. Then we went inside and found ourselves in the kitchen. Cato asked if I wanted anything food, listing off anything and everything he had in his refrigerator and pantry. Awkward. Finally after saying no to everything he had listed and had covered he announced he was going to toast himself a bagel. Then after cutting and placing the bagel into the toaster he remembered he promised or owed or whatever me the water he had offered me back on the beach. And that's how we got to now.

Then hearing the toaster pop, I am more than happy for something breaking the stillness in the air. Cato's silence wasn't as bad as Peeta but it still made me uncomfortable. Watching as he grabbed the bagel from the toaster, he set it on a plate quickly spreading a thin layer of cream cheese on each side before turning to face me. "So what's been up?" He asks, taking a bite of his bagel, "Haven't seen you around." I shrug my shoulders, "Working at the bar, planning a wedding, not much really." He nods his head as he places half of the bagel that remains onto the plate. "So you are going to marry him?" I nod and he nods in response. Awkward. Then watching him, I realize him staring down at Peeta's ring on my left ring figure. Awkward. Grasping my right hand over my left I ring them together. "Nice ring," he comments, "How did Lover Boy pay for it? Did Eric pay the bill for it? Did he sell some of those photos he got?" "He paid for it himself, Cato," I sternly respond, "He now owns and manages the bakery, he can afford it." "Right, forgot Eric signed the place over to him on Wednesday, free cookie I heard," he nods again, "Didn't think of you as much of a ring girl thought either." I shake my head, "Not really. This is like one of the maybe ten pieces of jewelry I own. I told him I didn't need a ring, but well Peeta insisted, said something about it being right."

"So you're going to marry him?" He asks again. What was he getting at? "Yes, Cato," I say a little irritated, "Why do you care so much?" He looks up at me, meeting my eye level. "You ever think I was interested in you?" "In fucking me," I say. He opens his mouth to say something, but I continue to talk. "Yeah, I thought you might have been, but then I realized, Cato, that you have had just about one serious relationship in your life and that was with Glimmer. Any and all relationships you have had with anyone have been just physical. As much as I hate to say it I need something more than that. And that is where Peeta falls, he's not just physical. I fell for him and for some reason he loves me." Seeing him shake, he slams his fist against the counter. "I can feel." I snort. "Bullshit Cato. You are the Brute. The best you can feel anger, lust, and an orgasm." Looking pissed as could be, I could see the anger bubbling up inside of him as he gripped the counter's side. "Says the queen bitch," he mutters. Letting out a stiff laugh, I stood up from my seat at the counter. Then walking toward the back door, I stop just before walking out the door. "Cya Cato." And then I'm out the door.

…

Walking into the living room of Annie and Finnick's house, Annie isn't the one I had expected to be sitting on the couch, but instead it's Finnick. Kind of disappointment that Annie wasn't the one home, I don't truly mind though. Annie, Finnick, Finnick, Annie, they were basically the same person; no, let me restate that, they were the same person. They talked the same, acted the same… well sort of the same, kinda. They were basically one being that had been divided into two, they completed one another. I glance over my shoulder to make sure Annie wasn't here as I let out an aggravated huff. Whatever, Finnick would do. Finnick knew what to say and knew when he was pushing it. And feeling Finn's eyes on me, I find myself confused on what to do with myself. Spinning around in a circle, I ended up standing where I was before: facing Finn and confusing. Looking to him as if he held the answer to whatever I was looking for he patted the open spot on the couch cushion beside him. So reluctantly I crossed the room and sat down beside Finn, tucking my feet under my butt. "What's up, Kitty," he asks clicking the remote so the television muted. "Were you ever friends with Cato?"

He laughed nodding his head. "Really?" I say surprised. Finnick and Cato were never that friendly with another, but then again they didn't talk much or hang out with one another. He nodded his head again. "We were kind of best friends up to junior year of high school." "What happened," I asked. "I started dating Annie and Cato became the world's biggest dick," he says, "He just wasn't a good friend. He talked shit about Annie all the time, spread rumors about her and talked behind my backs about her... He tried to get into her pants a few time, even told her he cared about her. He was just a complete ass and I didn't need him and his shit so we just stopped hanging out… Our friend group divided at that point. Marvel sided with me and then Peeta joined the gang. And Cato went and hung out with Glimmer and the jocks. We were friends and then we weren't. Cato hung with his friends and me with mine... Since then we've just- we just haven't been able to stand one another." I nod my head letting him know I get what he's saying. We sit there for a few moments before Finn talks again. "Can I ask why I'm telling you this?"

I shrug my shoulder. "I don't think were friends anymore." "Something happen?" I shrug my shoulder again. "I don't think he likes the idea that I'm going to marry Peeta, no, he doesn't like the fact that I am going to marry Peeta," I pause, "And then he told me he likes me… like actually likes me supposedly. Emotion and feelings and all." I stop and the room falls silent for a moment. Then breaking the silence Finnick said, "Sorry." I nodded. "It's cool I guess. I don't mind really… I mean, I guess I'm kinda pissed that he won't be there… I liked hanging out with him. He was past me minus the whoring around. He's cold and stern. He reminded me of me." Letting out a breath I expect myself to continue, but I don't. Instead of saying anything more I sit there in silence. Then in the moment of stillness, I felt Finnick wrap his arms around me. "You were nothing like Cato," he said, "And even if you were, you not anymore. Plus that doesn't mean you need to have him around as a reminder of who you were or weren't. And to add even more so… you don't need another jackass in your life, that's what Rye is for." Letting out a laugh I nod my head ever so glad I decided to come over.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

The Dress

…

Feeling a hand gently shake my shoulder, I let out a half-hearted moan of protest as my head rolls to the right. Yet that does not stop the hand from shaking my shoulder again. "Katniss," the familiar, soft voice whispers, "Katniss, com'on we're here. Wake up." I let out another moan, bringing my knees closer to my chest. "Katniss." The voice repeats, but I don't respond. I don't want to wake up. Continuing stay curled up in the position I had fallen asleep in, I don't move. There is a moment of stillness to which I let my mind think whoever is trying to wake me has given up and let me to my peace, but hearing a soft creak, second later I then feel something jab me in the side. With the jab I jump up letting out a squeak. Now up and awake, I stretch my legs out across the truck's cab before looking around for whoever had poked me. Looking to the driver's side to the hood and then to the bed, I turn to look behind me. And behind me, through the window stood Peeta on the sidewalk with a wily like smirk on his face. "Morning." I shot him a glare. "Sorry," he said, "Had to wake you and nothing else was working." Not acknowledging him, I let out a yawn before slowly pushing against the passenger's side door of the truck's cab.

Stepping out of the truck, my bones ache. These last few days have been a killer on me not only physically, but mentally. Last night, this morning, I hadn't closed the bar till about four and by the time I had cleaned up and made sure everything was prepped for the next night, Peeta was already waiting outside my apartment in the truck so we could go and drive into the city to go find a wedding dress... This whole week my life had been a miniature version of hell. The bar had become so crowded each night this week that I had to bring in Collin to act as a bouncer while I had Johanna, Rye and Marvel working for me most the nights. Plus in addition, Peeta and I had been working on end, crazily putting together our plans for the wedding so everything would go smoothly during the ceremony and all at the end of the month. In the meantime, I had been barely getting any sleep since I had not been getting home from the bar between any time from two to five and for some odd reason I had been waking up at the crack of dawn for no apparent reason... Finally out of the truck I shut the door behind me, falling into Peeta's side. "It's a Sunday," I mumble against his chest, "It's our day off, _our_ day. Why are we here?"

He laughed, rubbing his hand up and down my back making small circles. "Cause you need a wedding dress and supposedly I need a new pair of dress shoes," he says, "Plus you said "We are going to go this and listen to Cinna 'cause he knows his shit." Letting out another groan I slightly slam my head into Peeta's chest. "Don't listen to me next time. Stupid move, very stupid move." Letting out another laugh, Peeta wrapped his arm my waist and began to lead me around the block toward the front doors of Marcus's apartment building. Then through the front doors and into the elevator, Peeta basically carried me the entire way. It was as the doors of the elevator closed and as Peeta presses the seventh floor button that I could feel myself surrendering to the drowsiness I had been fighting. It didn't help that there was a soft classical melody playing throughout the elevator. And as the elevator _dinged_ as it passes each floor I felt myself sink deeper into Peeta's side as my eyes shut. By the time the elevator stop at the seventh floor I was sure I was asleep or somewhere in that hazy state between being awake and being asleep. Nevertheless Peeta picked me up into his arms, bridal style and carried me out of elevator.

After a few strides out the elevator, Peeta stops. There is a moment of silence and then something happens which I am not completely sure of. But hearing the click of a lock and the creak of a door I assume that we are standing across from Marcus whom had just mostly opened the door and was probably standing in the doorway with a confused look. "What did you do, kill her," I hear a voice say sarcastically, Marcus. "Shhh," Peeta says in a low tone stepping forward, "She hasn't slept more that six hours in the past week." I hear the door shut and assume Marcus had nodded in acknowledgement of Peeta's statement. Now most likely standing in the middle of Marcus's apartment, I curl closer into Peeta's chest. The room smelled of fresh coffee and toast… and guy. The air was a little chilly; probably a result of the air conditioner running, but it was bearable. "Why are you here so early anyway," I hear Marcus from behind us, "It's like what, seven, eight?" "Cinna told us to get here by seven, shopping was to begin at seven-thirty." "You didn't-" Marcus begins before starting over, "Ohhh shit, you didn't get my message last night."

"What message?" "That Cinna couldn't meet up with us till one-ish." With Marcus's response I feel Peeta's chest rumble as he lets out an aggravated moan. "Sorry," Marcus says and Peeta's chest rumbles again, "I thought you got my text." Then we start moving. We leave the main area of the apartment and… go down the hall. Peeta turns and push against something. And then he took a few more steps before setting me down on something soft and cushioned… a bed. Letting go of me I let out a whimper. No, I think, don't leave me. Yet it is only after a few moments pass before I feel the bed sink down beside me. Then his arms wrapped around me and pull me close. My body curled into his, I unsystematically mumbled into his chest. "Shopping… need to get-" But he cuts me off with a long _shhh_, drawing me closer against him. "We got some time, get some sleep." And so we lay there in silence. Its- it's perfect really. Just the two of us. Yet feeling myself drift further into the darkness, I feel Peeta shift. And with his moment my body grasp on to his for dear life. "Stay." I say in a slurred drowsiness. And like every time he replied, "Always."

…

The dress is puffy and sparkly and overall awful. Cinna must see it as he gives me a short nod of the head letting me know that I can get out of the damn things. So as fast as possible I rush out of the room and back into the dressing room not getting out of the dress fast enough. But once out of the dress and back into my shorts and flannel shirt I'm back beside Cinna in the front of the shop. Handing me my cup of coffee, I gratefully take it only when to bring it to my lips to find it empty. Giving Cinna a glance he let out a snort. "You drank it all?" I nod my head. "That's like your fourth cup." I shrug my shoulders. Even though I had slept a couple hours before Cinna showed up at Marcus's apartment I was still in a haze. Any minute I felt like I could just pass out. "One more?" I ask causing Cinna to give me a look. "Oh, come on Cinna, you have made me try on just about every dress in this store along those other four shops and I haven't even found I'm the slightest bit interested in." And so thinking about it for a minute he nods his head, "Okay, but this is your last cup, I swear to god this shit can't be good for you." So giving him a smile I head for the door while Cinna goes to say goodbye to the owner of the shop, an old friend from college he had told me earlier.

Out the door and down the block, Cinna and I find a small coffee shop of the street corner. Inside and once prepared with a large cup of green tea in hand, Cinna is pulling me out the door and down the block again. "Ah… Where to now?" "There's a place on the north side of town that I heard has some nice dresses. I haven't been there, but all the places we have already gone to have… Well I thought you would have found a dress at one of them." Turning to look at him I give him an apologetic smile. "Sorry," I say truthfully, "I mean I heard it's hard to find a dress, but I just supposed at least one store would have something simple and plane that I would like. Not all this glitter and puffy fabric and fancy shit." He returns to smile wrapping his arm around my shoulder and giving me a small squeeze. "It's fine," he says stepping out onto the street, "I'll hail a cab and we will stop at this last place and then we'll go back to Marcus's place." Nodding my head in acknowledgment a cab pulls up beside Cinna. And so ushered into the cab we ride over to the north side of the city.

Thus twenty minutes later, Cinna is leading me down this and that street. He didn't know where he was going. I think he just gave the cab driver a random address and hoped for the best. Anyway… we're lost. But… we weren't as Cinna wouldn't come to admit it. By him, the store is just around the corner. Just around the corner my ass, we had been at this for ten minutes. Nevertheless turning down another street, mid-way Cinna comes to a halt. Are we here? "We're lost," he states. Ah, no shit, I think, anyone could have told you that. Watching him pull out his phone mostly likely attempting to connect to the local Wi-Fi to find out where the hell we are I let out a soft laugh. I am never going shopping ever again with Cinna. Tired with no more green tea and no dress in hand, I was _a little_ pissed. As Cinna typed away on his phone, I turn to look at the location around us. We're of one of the side streets from Cornelius Drive. There were a few shops near the corner of Cornelius. So not bothering to just stand there I walked toward the corner. On the left was a small pizzeria and on the right a music store. Taking the right I make my way down the street.

Pass cafes and book stores and small offices and bouquets, its two blocks down that I find myself frozen in front of one of the store's windows. Quickly pulling out my phone, I pull up Cinna's contact and call. "Two block to the right, now." Then hanging I wait a few minutes before I feel Cinna beside my side. "That's it," I say pointing to the dress in the stores window. The dress was simple. It was strapless. A plain, white fabric that looked light and comfortable. It hugged the wired manikin's rib cage and flowed down straight at the hips. It was not puffy. It was not bedazzled or glittered. There were no elaborate stitches. It was not long and flowing. It was not layered of multiple fabrics. It was not fancy. It was exactly what I wanted. In my head I couldn't help, but laugh. It was the exact opposite of what Effie Trinket would have picked out for me. But it… It was me. Giving me a smile, Cinna wrapped his arm around my shoulder. "Well it looks like you found what you were looking for," he says with a genuine smile, "It's perfect." Returning his smile I say, "So we can go home now." He laughed. "Let's buy the dress first."

…

Feeling something rustle me from my slumber my eyes barely open to see Peeta gathering me up in his arms. Then feeling my eyes close I mumble, "I found a dress, Cinna can show you it in the apartment." "We're home, Katniss." He then shifts his hips and in response I hear a door shut before begins to climb the steps to my flat. When he reaches the landing at the top he stops, sliding his key into the lock using his arm hooked under my legs he opens the door. Inside he closes the door behind us. Following he hangs something up on the old coat hanger with his hand wrapped around my back before carrying me down the hall. Then feeling him shift and shuffle he lays me down on my bed. I then feel him untying and slipping my shoes off my feet. When he gets my left shoe off my foot I turn and groggily pull at my jeans shorts. Must get these off, I think. After a moment I hear Peeta let out a silent chuckle. "Katniss." And so giving in I stop pulling at my jeans. Then feeling Peeta's hands unbutton my jeans, he slips them off my hips followed by pulling my flannel shirt over my head. It's then as I lay in my sports bra and panties that I feel Peeta settle beside me, pulling a blanket over us.

Immediately snuggling into his warmth, he wraps him arms around me. "How many cups of coffee did you have today?" He whispers against the top of my head. "Five, six," I mumble into his chest, "And a tea." Feeling him shake his head he says, "You need to sleep." But I twist in his grip pulling away as if I was going to roll out of the bed and stand up. "I have to see you in the dress." "_I_ have to see _you_ in your dress?" He questions. I nod only to feel him to shake his head again. "That's bad luck." "No it isn't." I mutter like a child. "It is." "No," I say in protest, "It's not." Hearing him laugh in response he tightens his grip on me so we are pressed up against one another, inseparable. "Is or isn't, I don't want to see you in your wedding dress till our wedding day," he says, "I want it to be a surprise." I grunt, "I hate surprises." "I know," he laughs, "And it's not a surprise for you." "What if you don't like it?" "I'll love it," he reassures me, "I love you, you could walk down in a gorilla suit for all I care." Letting out a laugh I say, "I love you too. And I'm not wearing gorilla suit." "Good." And like that we fall into a peaceful silence. It is as I feel myself being overcome by my drowsiness I hear Peeta mumble, "I love you Katniss Everdeen."


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

The Move

…

Sitting there on the kitchen floor beside Peeta's feet, I reach up to tug on his sweatpants. "What's up," he asks looking down at me. "Do you have any boxes at the bakery or your place I could use?" He shakes his head no slowly, "There some creates behind the bakery if that'll works." "That'll work," I nod, tearing another bite size piece from the pancake I was eating, popping a piece in my mouth. So as I turn back to eating, I feel Peeta's eyes staring down at me. Then after a minute, he just does not stands there and stare, but shuts off the stoves burner to sit down beside me. Now sitting beside me and cautiously staring at me, he clears his throat asking, "Why do you need boxes, crates anyway?" I swallow the food I have in my mouth at the moment before taking the plate of pancakes and placing it on the kitchen counter above my head. "To pack up my stuff." He looks to me confused. "Where you going?" "Thought I was moving in with you." At this Peeta freezes as a broad smile grows across his lips. "Seriously," he asks. "Mh hmm," I nod, "I told you I like your place. It's homey and… right. Plus, living above a bar won't be any good." Giving me a smile, he leans over giving me a kiss, "Love you."

…

"This is ridiculous." Rye calls somewhere across my apartment. "Shut up Rye," I call back, "You signed up for this." Rye grunts, making some nonsense noise that is impossible to comprehend. Shaking my head, I pack the last of my belongings and the few of Peeta's from my bedroom into the box. Then I fold over the flaps and mark it "bedroom." Taking one last look around the room, there are a few things that remain, but things I don't need. Carrying the box from the room and down the hall, I set it beside the few other boxes that are already packed. Since a few days ago when I had told Peeta I would move in with him, we have been slowly bringing things over to his place. Most of my stuff was already there and now that everything that remained was some bedding and such that I wanted to bring over. Yet most of the stuff was going to stay, all the office supplies and whatnot, the couch and television, most of the kitchenware, and few things that remained in the bedroom. We figured we wouldn't rent out the place or anything. Rye and I have been talking about expanding the bar since it opens. So this morning while helping Peeta and I pack up some things he shared the idea about moving kitchen and storage room up into the apartment and which would then expand the bar.

I shrug my shoulders. All I can say for now that I'll consider it. It's a good idea and maybe over the winter we'll go through with it, but for now with the summer rush and having this whole wedding thing going on, I have no time. Shaking the thought from my head, I walk through the apartment and into the kitchen. Peeta was clearing out the cabinets of food while Rye sat on the counter, drinking a beer. "Everything," I ask and he nods his head. "Everything," he confirms, "Beer?" I nod my head and out of the six pack beside him, Rye hands me a beer. Twisting off the lid, I hop up on the counter beside him. We sit there in silence, sipping our beers. Its finally after a few minutes, Peeta closes the box he had been packing food into. "Good," I ask him. He smiles, walking over to me. Then leaning against my knees, he brings his lips to mine. The kiss is slow and loving. It is as he bites down on my bottom lip that I hear Rye clearing his throat. "Jesus Christ, I'm right here." Letting out a laugh I pull away from Peeta, hiding my face in the crook of his neck. As he laughs along with me, pulling me off the counter. "If you help me put the boxes in the back of the truck, you can leave." He says to Rye who I hear hop off the counter, the case of beer in hands as he heads for the hall. When Rye is gone, Peeta pulls me from the crook of this neck. "We were um, interrupted back there." I laugh, giving him a small, lingering kiss.

…

The place is done, complete, finished. Peeta and I are officially living together. We had successfully finished unpacking all my stuff in his apartment. Well, it's now _our_ stuff and _our_ apartment. Peeta and I are living together. We share everything. We took one fucking big step forward in life. Taking a deep breath I look around the apartment now, this is us, Peeta and I. In the main hall when you walk in, there is the old, wooden coat hanger from my place and the small end table Peeta always had there with a bowl of knick-knacks along with a picture of us a few winters ago. Then down into the living room and kitchen area, there is the rug from my bedroom under the coffee table and the few pillows along with my green blanket over the arm of Peeta's worn couch. Our movies and CDs and books are mixed together on the bookshelf beside the computer; and throughout the room there are scattered pictures on tables and walls that belong to both of us. In the kitchen, my mixed-matched utensils and plates are mixed in with Peeta's official, stainless steel kitchenware. On the refrigerator is our calendar and random notes and snap shots from those photo booths we have collected over the years. His radio still sits on the snack counter beside the goldfish Rye had left the other day when helping us move. When we called later after finding the fish he called it a "house warming gift."

Out the kitchen and back in to the hall, we lined the walls with pictures and painting Peeta had painted and taken. It took a lot of convincing, but he finally gave in to displaying some of his works. Then up the wooden stairs, the room is just like the kitchen and living room, it all one room… kind of. The master bedroom, the only bed, is the whole third floor along with the connected master bathroom, only bathroom in the place. The walls are a scarlet red and the floors are wooden. The bed is covered in a mixture of Peeta and mine bedding sets. The pillows are covered in striped, sunset orange casings which match the light, orange sheets on the bed under the black and red stitched quilt that use to cover my bed at Haymitch's. In the closet, our cloths are mixed together which we'll probably have to fix as of this morning, Peeta grabbed a pair of my jeans by mistake which became quite the show when he tried putting them on. Then in the bathroom, the light green towels Peeta had bought me when I moved into the flat above the bar hung on the rack and our toothbrushes sat together in the blue glass cup on the sink counter. Our shampoos and soaps were beside each other on the shower's shelf, too. Everything was how we wanted it. It may not look fashionable or whatever, but it was ours. The place was ours. This was us and I liked it. I was a little afraid, but I like this sort of fear. This was Peeta and I. It was scary, but that didn't matter, I loved Peeta and that's all that mattered to me. This was us. Peeta and I together. Always.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

The Name

…

"What did you name it?" Clove asks from the couch as she steals a piece of Rye's croissant from his plate. "We didn't," Peeta calls from the snack counter grabbing a pair of oven gloves as I get up from the floor beside the coffee table, collecting all the empty coffee mugs. "What have you been calling it then for the past few days?" Clove asks. "The fish," Peeta says before turning to take the blueberry muffins out so of the oven which I can proudly say I helped make this morning. "Or fin," I add. "After me?" Finn smiles and Annie lets out a giggle. I laugh, "Yes, after you," setting the mugs onto the counter beside the sink. "I knew you always loved me more than Mellark, Everdeen." I laugh again only to feel Peeta's arm snake around my waist, pulling me against his chest. "Watch it man," he says pointing the muffin in his hand at him, "I'll fight you." Finn raises his hands in surrender. "She's all yours Peeta; just remember she loves me more." Shutting him up with a glare, I stand on my toes, fisting his shirt in my right hand, and kiss Peeta's cheek. "Just remember Finn can be a gigantic jackass," I whisper in Peeta's ear which causes his chest to rumble in laughter. "I love you," he wishers back.

Giving Peeta a smile, I turn away from him and back to the empty coffee mugs. As I fill each mug with fresh coffee, I call over my shoulder, "Sugar or milk anyone?" "Milk," Finn calls as Clove and Marvel yell, "Sugar." So adding whatever requested to each particular coffee mug, I put away the sugar and milk before carrying the mugs back into the living room. "So what are you going to name it," Marvel asks as I hand him the mug that reads _That's How It Rolls_ with a unrolling roll of toilet paper underneath the words. "I guess we this need to talk about it," I shrug my shoulder as I hand everyone else their cups of coffee. "You can take a name from Peeta's collection of future baby names," Rye asks. "What!?" I just about shout. "Um," I hear Peeta come say beside me, "I- its- um-" "Oh shit," Rye mutter followed by an _uhhh_ as Clove hits him in the chest. "Peeta," I say turning to him, "What are they talking about?" "I um- I started- um-" Finn cuts him off, "Peeta always wanted kids just say." I nod my head knowing as I look Peeta in the eyes that he will explain later on tonight.

The room is silent till Marvel says something which I don't catch and everyone joins in. I don't bother finding out what everyone is talking about. Peeta divides a muffin in half, handing me the top and him taking the bottom. I give him a slight nod of thanks, but don't eat my half of the muffin; instead I just cup it in my hands not really knowing what to do. I just sit there, mind reeling. Peeta has a collection of baby names? What are the names? Are they girl names? Are they boy names? Names for both? Since when did he have this list of names? Why? Did he really want kids that badly? Was he expecting us to have kids right after the wedding? I didn't know if I could go through with that. Time. Kids, kids still scared me. I was more opened to the idea not, but I couldn't take that step right now. Living together… Marriage… And then maybe a few years down the road we could have kids, think about kids. Time. One step at a time. Uncrossing my legs, I stand up from my seat on the floor. "You okay," Peeta ask. I shake, nod my head, setting my muffin top on the coffee table. "Bathroom."

So up the stair and through the bedroom, I open the door of the bathroom. And there leaning against the toilet is Annie. Her face is pale and expresses a mask of discomfort. How did she get here, I didn't remember her leaving the living room. "Annie," I say going to sit down beside her, "What's up?" Closing her eyes, she leans her head back, running her hands over her face. Then rubbing her hands against her temple she opens her eyes. "I have to tell you something?" "Annie, why are you on my bathroom floor?" I ask. "Mornisicnes," she mumbles. "What did you say?" "Morninsickess." "What," I say again, "Don't know what you're saying Annie." "Morning sickness," she snaps. Morning sickness. Morning sickness. That mean- that means. "You're pregnant?" She nods her head. Annie's pregnant. Annie's pregnant with Finn's kid. Finn and Annie are having a kid. "You okay with it?" She smiles, nodding her head. "Surprisingly really happy, I'm having a baby and its Finn's." She laughs with a sort of joy and I give her a hopeful smile, "Congrats." She smiles again. "So what are you going to name it," she says puffing her cheeks out like a fish and using her hands to make gills. I smile shaking my head before pointing to her stomach, "What are you going to name it?

…

Ringing out my hair one last time, I begin to braid it. After a minuet once complete, I tie a rubber band at the tail. Then flicking the bathroom lights off, I walk into the bedroom. Peeta is pulling off his sweatpants, leaving him just in his boxers. He then turns, facing me. "Hey." I smile, "Talk?" He nods his head yes as he crawls onto the left side of the bed. And when comfortable, he pats the open mattress beside him on the right side of the bed. So crawling up onto the bed, I lean against a pillow propped up against the bed's headboard, bringing my knees to my chest. Sitting there in silence, Peeta's hand finds mine and we link our hands together. "I've always wanted kids," he begin, "You've known that. I've always been a kid person. And the moment I knew you were the one, I always pictured us getting married and having a kid or kids… I know I'm weird. I'm a hopeless romantic… And the list. It's not really a list. It's… I just always wanted a boy and a girl. Maybe a James or Scarlett, a Gray or West, or whatever we want it to be called. It's not a list… It's just some thoughts that come to mind when thinking about kids…" He trails on a little longer, his words becoming jumbled and sentences becoming misunderstood.

Its then when Peeta breaths in, finished speaking that we sit there in silence for a moment. Then after a moment, giving his hand a squeeze, I say in a low tone, "Okay." "Okay?" I tell him ask as he eyes stare down at me. "Okay," I restate, "I get what you're saying." "And you're not freaking out on the inside, right?" "Right," I confirm, "Not freaking out." He squeezes my hand in return, kissing my cheek. "Just know I don't want kids," I tell him, "I don't want kids, at least not right now. The idea till scares me, but I'm opening up to with it… And you know it's not you, I have my own I issues, reasons why. I want your kid or kids, it would be ours and I would love it. Just don't except it to happen right away... Time. I need time. I'm sorry, but that's just how it's going to be with me, I got to shit… I'm going to need your help to get there, too. I just- I just need time. And one day, I will be fine and we can name it a James or Scarlett, a Gray or West, or whatever we want it to be called." Scared of what Peeta might do, he wraps his arm around my shoulder. "One step at a time.

So leaning into his chest, Peeta wraps his arms tighter around my chest, bringing me closer to him. "Finn and Annie are having a kid." "Finn told you," I ask. "Yeah," he nods, "And Annie told you I take it." I nod, "When I went to the bathroom today when everyone was over, I found her leaning against the toilet. Morning sickness." Peeta nods again, "Yeah, Finn says she's been up every day this week at odd times with it." I nod my head remembering everything Annie had told me earlier in the day. About two weeks ago she realized something was wrong and took a pregnancy test. Well it showed a little positive plus sign along with four other tests. So last week then went to the doctors and wa-la, Annie was confirmed to be pregnant. She says she's happy and I believed her, her smile told it all. Finn was supposedly ecstatic by Annie, going on if it was a girl that he would spoil her and if it was a boy he would teach him how to swim and play football and it all. Me, I was happy, scared for them, but happy. And Peeta I knew without him telling me that he, like Finn, was overjoyed about the fact that his best friends were going to have a kid. "They'll be good parents," Peeta say confidentially, "Which brings me to ask, the fish."

I groan aloud, "Ahhh, the fish." Peeta laughs, poking me in the side. "We got to name it," he says. Letting out another groan, I throw back my head into Peeta's chest. "Is it a boy or a girl?" "What," he asks. "The fish," I say tilting my head up to look at him, "Is it a boy or a girl, you know for naming purposes." "Hmm," he says dragging it out, "What do you want it to be?" Thinking for a moment I smile, "A boy." "A boy?" I nod. "Okay," he says, "Now we need a name." "It can't be something cliché," I say, "We can't name it after one of us or give it a made up name that is nonexistent." Peeta nods in acknowledgment and we fall into a silence, thinking of names we can name our fish. So going through the alphabet a few times, I come up with names for each letter, only remembering the ones I really like. And then after a few minutes Peeta gives me a squeeze, "Got a name." I nod, "You first." "Jones," he says, "Now you." I shrink into him. "Don't judge," I say, "Quentin." "Hm, Quentin," Peeta says, "Quentin, I like it." "Really?" "Yeah," he nods, "Make the fish sounds smart and kind of a badass." I laugh. "Yeah," Peeta says laughing with me, "Quentin Mellark."


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

The Fear

…

_The rain was pounding down on the windshield as Gale' sold, shitty wagon lurched into the intersection just after looking both ways. Visibility wasn't that great, but Gale promised it was fine, that he could manage. Someone is naming radio stations in the back seat as Prim was messing with the radio, trying to find something that isn't static when we hear the screeching of tires. The screeching of brakes. It was violently loud, frightening. I whipped my head around in the direction of the noise. And then I watched as the speeding pickup truck crashed into us. No. Prim. The wagon flipped onto the side causing me to clutch Prim's waist tighter than I already was. Oh, God. No. We weren't buckled in; it was less than a mile ride home, we saw no reason to buckle ourselves into the seat. No one drove on these roads, this late at night. The car windows shattered on impact and the side of the car had indented into the passenger seat crushing Prim and I. We were trapped. No, no, no. Prim. _

_Time passes. The rain comes through the broken window. The down pour has picked up, becoming worse than every second. Prim was uncontrollably shivering causing me to pull her even closer to my chest. I could feel her heart begin to slow. No, I thought, she can't. No, no, no. Not Prim. Panicking, I looked around the car. Prim, sitting on my lap. Gale in the driver's seat. And Peeta in the back. _Wait, what? Why was Peeta in the back, when did he get there? The voice murmuring radio stations, that was him?_ His face was bloody and skin pale. No, not Peeta. Panicking, I reached back, trying to touch him. Only I can't. Reaching again, I pressed against Prim causing her to let out a straggled gasp. Pulling away from Peeta, I looked to Prim. Her face was in pain and her hands clutched her side. And there in her side was a piece of glass, bleeding out. No, no, no. Clutching her side, attempting to stop the bleeding, it didn't help. Prim went pale and her face stiffened. She was gone. Tearing streaming down my face, I turned to Peeta. Bent over, I stiffened. No. No. No. _

Shooting up, I gasped for air. My hair stuck to the back of my neck and my skin was covered in a thin layer of sweet. My hands shaky, my bones were stiff. "Just a- a nightmare," I stutter aloud, "You're fine- fine." Yet I couldn't seem to shake it. Shutting my eyes, Peeta's bloody faced reappeared, Prim's tortured expression, Gale's coldness. Crying, I felt my body shake. No, no, no. My head beginning to pound, everything seemed to worsen. Hands shaky. Skin slick. Hair matted. Head heavy. Bones achy. Mind jumbled. Confused and scared I curled across the bed, reaching for my cell phone somewhere on the nightstand. Then clutching the phone in my hand, I tap the screen, hoping to god I'm calling the correct person. "Hello?" I hear a groggy voice answer. "Fin-nn," I stutter out. His voice perks up, coming to life, "Kitty, what's wrong?" "Katniss," I hear a faint voice say in the background. "Ann-ie?" I whisper. "Kitty focus, listen to me," Finn says in a firm voice, "Tell me what's wrong," I clutch my jaw with my free hand, doing my best to focus like he told me to. "I- I… they're ba-back… nightmares." I hear him suck in a deep breath, mumbling something I don't make out to Annie. "Kitty, we'll be right over."

…

I wake up, throat raspy, cheeks wet. No, no, no. I curl into the fetal position, becoming even more so tangled up in the bed's sheets. I can't help but cringe at the fact that _they're_ back. Five years and they haven't seemed to cease. Confused and scared, my mind pounds against my skull. The nightmares over taking my vision, I feel like I'm in a haze. Squeezing my eyes shut, I press the palm of my hand to my temple. Why were they back? It had been months, why now? What the hell was going on? "Ahhh," I groan as the pounding in my head becomes worse and heavy as a ton. "Kitty," I hear a voice say. "Ah," I groan again, this time peaking my eyes open just enough so I can see who's there. And there standing in the bathroom is Finn, buttoning a green collared shirt up. What's going on? "You called my cell phone at one o'clock mumbling something about nightmares," he tells me, "Annie and I were worried so we came over as soon as possible. We came over to find you with shaking with the chills, even muttering some nonsense in your sleep. Since we got here, you've been up every hour. Don't remember?" I shake my head thinking back to what had happened during the night.

Finishing buttoning up his shirt, Finn quickly tucks it into his jeans before coming over beside where I lay, squatting down to my level. "So scared the shit out of us, especially Annie." "Sorry," I mumble into the bed sheets. "It's fine." He reassured me. Looking to him, a realization over comes me. "Did you tell Peeta?" He shakes his head no. "Thought that would be something you would like to tell him. And you should tell him they're back, he would be… disappointed to find out from someone that was not you." I nod my head. Finns right, I'll have to tell Peeta or else who know what will happen. Watching me for a moment more, Finn stands up, flattening his shirt. "I'm gonna make you a cup of tea, okay?" I nod my head and with that Finn is out the room, his footsteps taking him down the stairs and into the kitchen. Then a couple minutes later, he is back up with a steaming cup of tea in the mug that read _How About A Nice Cup Of Shut The F*ck Up_. "Drink," he demands handing the mug over to me. And so graciously taking the mug, I cup it in my hands, taking in its warmth. Then taking a sip, the tea fills my. It's warm and refreshing and it's… sweet and creamy and unfamiliar. Finishing the tea, Finn takes the mug from my hands. And as I lay there a bittersweet aftertaste fills my mouth, I feel my eyes become droopy and mind fuzzy.

…

"Ah, shit," I groan, grabbing at my temple, "Finn." My mind hazy and confused I can't help but think what the hell was in the tea? Did he drug me? I swear if he did he will- "Sleep syrup sweetheart," I hear a gruff voice say from behind me, answering my question, "Knocked you out for a good twelve hours." Rolling over, I come to see Haymitch sitting against the headboard of the bed. What? Why was he here? When did he get here? "Haymitch?" I ask muddled. "Good evening to you too sweetheart," he crookedly smiles, "Finally gracing me with your presences." I groan, throwing my head further into Peeta's pillow. "Nightmares back I hear." I reluctantly nod my head, still buried in Peeta's pillow. "The boy still up north?" I nod my head again mumbling into the pillow, "Trip got pushed back three days, friends decided he needed a few more days to hang out." Haymitch grunts, "So he's gonna be gone five days now?" I nod my head yes. "And he's coming back," he pauses, counting the days on his fingers, "tomorrow night?" I nod my head again. "Well," he says, lifting himself of the bed, "Get out of this dam bed and take a shower. I'll go make something for you to eat. Ten minutes."

Therefore up and out, I go into the bathroom and rinse away the day. I scrub my skin clean of the nightmares and haunting thoughts. I stand there in the shower till the water goes cold. Even then I wait it out. I stand there in the shower's cold downpour making sure everything bad is gone. It's not till I realize I am shaking from the frigid water that I step out of the shower, turning the nub so the waters flow stops. Then pulling on a pair of gray leggings with a pair of neon green sock and one of Peeta's oversized sweatshirts from college I head down to the kitchen, braiding my hair on the way. It's as I enter the kitchen, tying off my braid with a rubber band that Haymitch sets a plate of waffles on the snack counter. "Frozen waffles," he says in responds to what I assume is the confused look I give him. I nod my head. Makes sense, Haymitch can only cook so much and making waffles that weren't from a box in a freezer was something he couldn't cook. And so sitting myself down at the table, I watch as Haymitch sets out plates and utensils, maple syrup and butter, orange juice and tea. Once he's done, he looks to me with concern, "Eat."

So two waffles later, Haymitch speaks up. "How long have they been back?" "Two days?" He nods, taking a bite of his waffle. "The boy know?" I shake my head. Haymitch grunts, "You should tell him." "I know," I agree, "When he gets back; I'm not ruining his trip." Haymitch grunts again in an approving manner if possible. Then as he finishes off his fourth waffle, he reaches for the last waffle on the plate between us, his fifth waffle. "Are they the same," he asks. The same? What did that mean? "Huh?" "Come on sweetheart," he says looking up from his plate, "Are the nightmares the same ones you use to have five years ago? Or have they changed over the years?" I look at him over my cup of tea, fiddling with the string of the tea bag which hangs out of the mug. Then taking as few breaths I shake my head. "Last night it was different," I say in a low tone, cupping my tea mug. Haymitch nods his head not saying anything else, knowing me well enough that I don't want to talk about it. And so we finish our meal in silence. It's not till Haymitch is about to leave after he had shockingly cleaned up the kitchen, putting the dishes and what not away that he speaks. "Talk to the boy about it all."

…

I work through the night following Haymitch's leave. The moment he left, I went down to the bar. From bartending to waitressing to cleaning to prepping till its eight the next night, I kept busy. Its then at eight that Collin is walking me back to the bakery, making sure I get home. Rye kicked me out of the bar, told me to get rid of the bags under my eyes and redness in my eyes before coming back to work. "'Night Katniss," he says with a smile, "Get some sleep." I nod my head, watching him walk down back to the bar before going through the backdoor of the bakery and up the stairs into the apartment. Out of my heels, I climb the stairs to the bathroom. I set my heels outside the bathroom door before stripping out of my cloths to quickly shower. So into the steaming water I don't waste time. Then out of the bathroom I wonder into the bedroom, dressing myself in a pair of boy shorts and a tank top. Sleep. Bed. Sleep. That's what I was supposed to do. Rye told me to sleep. Collin told me to sleep. My body was telling me to sleep. Now I just had to. Sleep. Bed. Sleep. Go lie down and try to sleep, I think, shut your eyes and try to sleep. And so crawling onto Peeta's side of the bed, I lay on top of the quilt, curled in a ball.

Hours must go by before I hear the apartment door open. Listening in, a pair of footsteps climb the stairs and soon are standing in front of me. "Katniss?" Peeta looks down at me, dropping his backpack beside my heels and scattered clothes. "Hey." "Why are you up," he frowns. I stretch my legs out a bit before bringing them back close to me. "Nightmares," I mumble. "What," he asks squatting down to my level. "Nightmares," I say again and this time Peeta hears me. "When?" I look away from him, "A few days ago." "Katniss-" He begins, but I just shake my head. And he knows. He knows that I'll talk when I want to and that for now I just need him. So tugging off his jeans and pulling off his polo, he climbs onto the bed, wrapping himself around me. That's how we stay, wrapped in one another. Here I feel safe… at home… whole… at peace… loved… Laying there I whisper, "They were different… You were there… You were in the back seat… You- you didn't… I lose- I lose you…" I trail on. Peeta listens. And when I'm run out of words and tearing up, Peeta's there. He tightens his grip around my waist, pulling me close. "I'm here," he says, "And I promise you, I'm not going anywhere anytime soon."


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

The Party

…

"To Peeta and Katniss," Gale says with his beer raised in the air. "To Peeta and Katniss," everyone else in the bar repeats, raising their glasses along with Gale. And just as easily as everyone raises their drinks, they soon come back down and the party continues. The party. So instead of having a bachelor and bachelorette party along with a rehearsal dinner for the wedding a week following, Peeta and I decided to have just one big party two days before the wedding. One party, simple. Really Peeta and I didn't want bachelor and bachelorette parties because of two things: One, Peeta and I weren't that party hard type of people. Two, every time we usually got dragged out by the gang, we usually drank way too much than we would on our own and wake up the next morning on the bathroom floor. Another reason we were having the whole one-party-thing was because we didn't see anything going wrong at the wedding. All that had to be done for the wedding was everyone show, some of us had to walk down the aisle, say our vows, and then everyone had to the after party. So with not much to go over, there was not that much of a reason to have a dinner-party-rehearsal. So here we all were, all our family and friends hanging out in the bar.

Stepping down off the chair he was standing on, Gale gave me a smile as he approached to where I standing. "Still can't believe you're getting married, Catnip." I smile, "Me either." He smiled, wrapping his arm around my shoulder and kissing my cheek. "Aw, look at you growing up," he teases me. Rolling my eyes, I shoved him playfully and he laughed. His arm is replaced by one in a blue shirt and the smell of vanilla and cinnamon fills the air, Peeta. "Hey," he smiled at us as I titled my head up to look at him. I smile back like an idiot. At this I hear a gagging noise followed by an _ohh_. Looking up, I see Madge had taken her spot beside Gale. "Congrats," she says as Gale wraps his arm around her waist. "Thank you," Peeta replies politely. Gale gives me the nod of his head, telling me to go and talk and whatnot with everyone else here. And I give him a smile back, telling him I'm happy that he's here, thankful that he decided to come all the way down her for me, and overall joyed by the fact that shit was going okay for once, that we were happy and safe and love and just okay. Nevertheless so giving one another a simultaneous nod of the head, I excuse Peeta and I and Gale tells us to go have fun. And then Peeta and I venture off into the bar.

"I still don't get your guys' unspoken language of nodding," Peeta says as we walk pass small groups of people, close first cousins of Peeta's I think. I shrug my shoulder and before I can say anything, Marcus is crushing me into a hug. "Mar- can't- breath." Letting out a laugh, he lets me go. I suck in a deep breath. I will never get use to those "bear-hugs." "You're getting married," he nearly shouts. "Yeah," I nod. "Well, congrats." Nodding our heads, Peeta looks to me with apologetic eyes. He's sorry that Marcus is drunk. It's not something bad or something he should even be sorry about. I've seen Marcus drunk, but I suppose Peeta had expected better from him tonight. "Sorry," the girl between Marcus and Cinna says. I look to her along with Peeta with suspicion. She looks familiar. "Katniss and Peeta, this is my sister Portia," Cinna says, "And Marcus's girlfriend." I nod my head recalling the conversation between Marcus and Cinna the day I left when Cinna came to relieve my babysitting duties. "Nice to meet you," Peeta says to her. "You too," she says shaking his head. "Good luck with him," I say motioning to the smiling Marcus as he loops his arm around her shoulder. Portia laughs, "Best of wishes with that one." Peeta smiles with pride and I laugh, "I'll need it." "Hey," Peeta says in protest and Portia and I just smile. Butting in, Cinna shakes his head, "Go talk to everyone else before you rub off on my sister." Peeta laughs dragging me along as I stick my tongue out at Cinna.

"I'm not that bad," I say in protest as Peeta leads me over toward the booths. He laughs, "You're fashion sense is from what Cinna tells me." "Is not," I say nudging him with my hip, "Plus you like what I wear." He nods, staring down at the black and scarlet, semi-skintight cocktail dress with my black lace-ups shoes. "Well, I suppose I'm not that fashionable either, but I don't care cause fashionable or not, you always look_ fine_." Blushing, I nudge him again with my hip. He cracks a smile and then next thing together we break out laughing. "We - are - awful," I say between breaths. "I thought I was pretty cool," Peeta winks, giving me a squeeze, "Super fresh even." "Ha," I laugh, "You're worse than me." "Hey," he cries in protest. We continue to laugh at our stupid comments and joke toward one another. In time we finally make our way over to the booth where Rye and Clove, Finn and Annie are seated. "Hey," Clove says as I slid into the empty space beside Finn as Peeta follows. "Nice party," Rye comments, taking a sip of his beer, "Smart idea."

Finn shakes his head though unlike the others who nod their heads in an agreement with Rye. "Still say we go out tomorrow night and have a bachelor party." "Finn-" Annie says in a cautious tone as if she is warning a child not to do something. "Hey," Finn says raising his hands up in defense, "You girls could go out too. Drink or have some chick flick movie marathon or have a sleep over or talk about whose significant other has a bigger ding-dong." At this both Annie and I slap Finn's shoulder. "Ahhh ah," he cries out, "That hurt, ahhh, like shit." Clove smirks and elbows Rye who is laughing his ass off. "Idiot," I barely hear Annie mutter as she rolls her eyes at her obnoxious boyfriend only ignoring his childish complaints as she drinks from her glass of water. "Good," I mutter, stealing his beer, "It was supposed to." Peeta laughs, standing up out of the booth. "Well, okay then," he smiles, helping me out of the booth, "We are going to talk to others before Katniss decides to kill Finn and we have to spend our wedding in the county jail."

Taking a sip from Finn's beer which I still hold in my hand, Peeta lead me out of the booth and over to where Haymitch, Eric, Chaff and Seeder stand against the back wall. "Sweetheart," Haymitch smiles. I smile along with Peeta. "How are you," Peeta ask them. "Having a great time," Chaff and Seeder smile, "Everything's good." "That's good," I nod and Seeder reaches over and gives my hand a squeeze. Eric takes a sip of his drink nodding his head in agreement with what Chaff and Seeder had said. "I'm happy for you kids." "Thank you, Eric," I smile as Peeta agrees, "Thanks dad." Standing there, everybody makes small talk, but I don't join in. I stand there watching Haymitch sip his scotch. And so tilting my head back, I finish off Finn's beer before leaning over, tapping Haymitch's elbow with the beer bottle. "Haymitch, what is it?" He looks to Peeta. "Boy," he says catching Peeta's attention and causing him to turn to face him. "Haymitch," he smiles, "How are you?" "Pissed," he said, "You boy are the reason I have to dress in a tux in two days."

"What," I say surprised. That wasn't part of the plan we talked about two weeks ago. We were going to cut the bridesmaid and groomsmen and have none. Eric was inviting some cousins of the family who owned a restaurant in the city and would help prepare the food with him between the thirty to sixty minute bag between the ceremony and the reception. And Haymitch was going to wear his black suit that he wore to my graduation with a white colored shirt and no tie if he felt like it. "I thought you were just wearing your black suit." "Hm, me too," he grunts pointing toward the bar where Effie Trinket stands in her too-high-high-heels and her insufferable, bring pinks dress, "My _girlfriend_ says otherwise." Chaff lets out a laugh which causes her to shoot him a glare, but her herself you could tell was holding back laugh. It still got Chaff and Seeder that Haymitch and Effie were dating. I say, "We'll fix that." "Huh," he grumbles, "How you suppose that?" "Peeta." Peeta turns and looks to me, but before he can say anything in protest to what I am proposing Haymitch cuts in with a cautious warning of, "Boy."

It takes a moment before Peeta responds. He and Haymitch stare at one another in that time. But Peeta is the one that folds as he lets out a breath, takes my beer and points at Haymitch like a scalding parent. He opens his mouth and then shuts it only to open it again. "If I'm not back in fifteen," he says to me, "Go for help." And with that, Peeta walked away toward the bar. Haymitch grunted in pleasure most likely, Eric and Chaff smiled like children, and Seeder laughed, "That lady loves that boy, such proper manners, he'll live." Nodding my head I smile, "Well, I'm going to go hang out close so I can save him if he calls for an S.O.S." They all laugh expect for Haymitch who shows a smile, waving me to go on. So taking my leave, I head to the corner of the bar near the door. I take a seat on a lone bar stool seated beside the wall; I sit out of view from Peeta and Effie making sure I don't make myself obvious. And as I sit, I watch as Effie smiles and laughs as Peeta talks to her. Seeder was right, that lady does like Peeta, probably because he was a "proper, young gentleman" as she had called him during one of our weekly dinners at Haymitch's house. Smiling to myself, I continue to sit unbothered, looking out for an unexpected S.O.S. from Peeta when I feel someone's presence beside me.

Turning to see who it is, I turn to look into Cato's eyes. "Hey," he smiles, bringing the bottle of beer in his hands to his lips. Cato, we haven't talked that much since he told me he had "feelings" for me, just short conversations when he came into the bar for a drink or when I ran into him around town. "How are you," I ask. He shrugs his shoulder, "Been better." I nod my head and we fall into an awkward silence. As I sit there, Cato drinks his beer. I can smell the liquor on him and am sure he drunk for right there on the edge. And as we sit there, I swear I feel him grow closer. It's then when I turn to look at him that my face is less than an inch from his face. "Cato," I say leaning back to my head rest against the brick wall, "What are you doing?" He shrugs his shoulders, taking another long sip from his beer. "Don't know," he says between drinks, "What are _you_ doing?" I give him a sad look shaking my head. What was he doing? "Cato-" I begin but he cuts me off, pointing his finger at me. "What are you doing Katniss," he says resting his arm again the wall beside my head so he is able to lean forward without toppling over, "What the hell are you _doing_?"

And I know what he's asking me. He's asking why I am having this party… going through with this… marrying Peeta. "I'm marrying Peeta." I state. He laughs, shaking his head, "'Cause you love him?" "Yes," I say firmly, "Yes." He snorts, washing back the rest of his beer. "Well you're real convincing," he says sarcastically. That at asshole. Way to be a dick. Way to be a douche. God. Ahhh. Looking to him disgusted I stab his chest with my pointer finger. "Screw you for thinking you're all high and mighty. You're not. I don't _have_ to convince anyone, but Peeta about my love," I tell him, standing up from seat so my chest is only a few inches from his as I look up at him in an authoritative manner, "I don't care if _you're_ not convinced that I love him because you don't matter. You don't have to be convinced. The only one that matters is Peeta. _Only_ Peeta. He is the only one I have to convince. He is the only one I care enough to convince. And I don't give a shit about you or anyone else who doesn't think I love him 'cause I do. I love Peeta Mellark. I love him so much that I'm going to spend the rest of my life with him. And in two days I'm going to marry him."

My chest is heaving by the end of my rant. Cato looks down at me pissed as shit. And I know around us people are watching. Cato is steaming. I know everything is boiling to the top now and any moment now it's going to pop. He clinches his hands into and unclutches and at some point he clench the beer bottle a little too hard and it snaps. Glass is on the floor and more people are watching. His breathing has picked up and I can tell he's trying to control his anger, but its boiling over. "Cato," I warn him again seeing now as the people near us turn to look, "Don't make a scene." "Fuck you," he murmurs in a low tone, "You screwed me over." At this point the commotion has caught Peeta's attention. He stares at me with concern, but I shoot him a look, telling him to stay back. "You screwed yourself over," I tell him. He gives me a glare, stepping forward and banging me into the wall. Peeta jumps forward, but thankfully Cinna and Rye step in front of him and hold him back. "You said you "liked" me right?" He doesn't respond, but continues to glare. "Then why did you sleep with Glimmer that day following your mass confession?" I ask. He remains silent, still staring, but stunned. I smile letting out a short laugh. "Exactly."

Standing there in a dead stare, I watch in the corner of my eye as a hand clamps onto Cato's shoulder. He jerks the slightest bit at the touch, but quickly recovers. Then turning to his side, I watch as Haymitch stood behind him, a glass of scotch in hand. "Time to go boy," he says nodding his head toward the door. Cato looks from Haymitch to the door and then back to Haymitch. Haymitch nods his head, taking a sip of his drink. "Go." Cato stands there for a moment, contemplating what to do. And after a minute, he pulls his arms away from me so I was no longer pushed up against the wall, nods his head at Haymitch, and then makes his way to the door. Watching as he left, Haymitch asked in a low tone, "You okay, sweetheart?" I nod my head, "Fine." He takes another drink form his glass before turning to the bar. "Shots!" And even though I'm sure half the bar is confused and muddled, they broke into cheers, raising their glasses into the air. Shaking my head, I let out a laugh. "Thank you," I say in a small voice to Haymitch. He smiles pointing behind me. Thus turning around I see Peeta. He looks upset yet happy, fazed. "I'm fine," I assure him as he pulls me into a hug. He doesn't say anything, but rubs circles on my back. "I'm fine," I repeat, "Okay." He nods pulling away from the hug, but leaves his arms wrapped around my waist. "You don't have to convince me," he says, "I was a goner from the start."


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

The Wedding

...

I can feel the rays of sun streaming through the bedroom window and onto my back. It feels warm and comfortable. I hear seagulls outside somewhere along with a soft voice in arms reach calling my name, asking for me to wake up. I don't bother to though. I don't want to wake up, I just wanted to lay here on peace with Peeta. Peeta... So instead of responding I bury myself further into my pillow and hope whoever it is goes away. They don't though, they keep talking to me, even shake my should lightly. "Katniss, you have to get up." But I say otherwise, letting out a groan of protest as I roll over to Peeta's of the bed. Yet when I roll, I don't roll into Peeta as suspected, but onto a cold and empty mattress. Confused, I twist so I cover every part of the bed, making sure Peeta whether or not he's on the bed. He isn't. Not knowing what is going on, I begin to listen to the voice talking to me. "Katniss you have to get up, we don't have time for this."

So forcing myself to open my eyes, I come face to face with Cinna. Cinna? What was he doing here? Why was he in Peeta and I's bedroom Wait, where was Peeta? If he wasn't in bed, then where was he? Was Cinna the reason he wasn't here? And so confused and puzzled about what was going on in my surroundings, I ask in a rash, low tone, "Peeta? Where is he?" At this Cinna as if he just saw the cutest thing in the world. "He's at Eric's," he says, "Marcus came a little while ago to get him. He also dropped me off here before taking Peeta back to the house to get ready which is what you're suppose to be doing." Huh? Why did Marcus take Peeta? Why was Cinna here? What were they getting ready? What was happening? Baffled so much I swear I look to Cinna with wild eyes and crazed hair. Cinna smiles again at me. "Katniss," he tells me, "You're getting married today, remember?" _Oh shit._

...

Taking the flask from Haymitch's hand, I down it's substance. Scotch, not whiskey as I had hoped, but it helped. So with an empty flask and in panic I look to Haymitch for more. He was a semi-past drunk, there was no doubt some sort of liquor around. "You need to calm down sweetheart." I shoot him a glare, "I need to calm down,_ I am getting married _in under fifteen some minutes." He smiles, holding back a laugh as he walks over the counter where he opens one of the cabinet doors near the sink, pulling out two glasses and a unopened bottle of whiskey. Baffled, he laughs. "You can only beat a drunk at his own game for so long," he smiles, "And hiding booze in the storage area under your sink, a place I know you never use was the perfect place for my best bottle of whiskey... and some other booze over the last few years."

I can't help but smile at was Haymitch, snappy and smart. But then shaking my head knowing I shouldn't give him praise for his cleverness, I un-stack the cups and slide them across the table toward him. "Just pour me a drink." And letting out a laugh, he does exactly that, pouring a drink for himself and one fore me. I down mine quickly and pour myself another in the time Haymitch drinks half of his. Its on my third drink that that door opens and Marcus pops his head in. "Hey you got two-" But he shuts himself off at the sight of me and the glass of whiskey in my hand. "Are you getting drun-" This time I cut him off with a glare that tells him he should shut him mouth before he goes any further as he has no right to speak at the moment. Thankfully he gets the message, nodding his head obediently and repeating, "Two minutes," before stepping out.

Finishing my drink, Haymitch does the same. Then coming over to where I stand, he links his arm with mine. And in a low tone I say, "Haymitch, I'm sacred." He gives me a smile, "Me too." But still feeling the butterflies fluttering around my stomach I can't help, but think this all might be one big mistake. "No," I hear Haymitch say behind me as if he is answering my question, but I didn't say it aloud- shit, I said it aloud. "From what I see, you're not making a mistake sweetheart. You love that boy and that boy is head over heels for you." He then pauses for a moment before continuing. "And if he does pull any shit, I'll cut off his balls." Together letting out a laugh, we lean into one another as if we can't hold ourselves up. But soon enough our laughter dies and we both look to the door. "Lets do this sweetheart."

So out the door, we walk along the small pathway made of stepping from which we venture off and make our way over the dunes. Then as we walked over the dunes, it is not the small group of friends and family members gathered that I first see or the surfboard I suppose Rye shoved in the ground behind Father Claudius that reads "It's Finally Happening." The first thing I see is Peeta. Peeta Mellark. Peeta dresses in the same black suit with white shirt and thin black tie he wore at his college graduation. Peeta smiling there like an idiot with his hands folded over one another. Peeta who's hair is ruffled and out of place as no doubt he has been running his hands through it. Peeta who I can't help, but smile at who is going to marry me. And as Haymitch and I walk down the sand path toward Peeta I can't help, but think Haymitch was right, I wasn't making a mistake.

Nevertheless as if doesn't take long enough, we finally make it to where Peeta stands. Haymitch unlinks his arm from mine, leaning forward to kiss my forehead. "Love you kid," he says in a small voice. I smile back at him, "Love you too, Haymitch." Then offering my hand out to Peeta, he gratefully reaches out to take it. But Haymitch does not release my hand from his so Peeta could take mine, not without pulling Peeta into a close handshake saying loud enough for only the three of us to hear, "You hurt her, I chop your balls off with a spoon." Peeta swallows loudly and Haymitch smiles. Pleased, Haymitch hands me over to Peeta and turns, making his way to stand beside Effie. Then, its just the two of us, Peeta and I. Its just us standing there on our alter of sand and an unexpected surfboard placed behind Father Claudius. And with the two of us there, Father gives us a nod before beginning the ceremony.

Father only stops talking when it comes time for Peeta and I to recite our vows. So as Father motions to Peeta, he begins. "I fell for you the moment I laid eyes on you at the train station five years ago and since then I have been a goner. I love when you scrunch your forehead when you're confused or wrinkle your nose when you nibble at cheese buns or when you smile like the happiest person in the world when it is down pouring or when you blush when someone catches you singing in the kitchen. I can't elaborate anymore how much I love you with you rolling your eyes and calling me a hopeless romantic, but I love you. I vow to be your always." Peeta lets out a breath along with myself who lets out a I didn't know I was holding. That was why I loved Peeta, he knew exactly what to say in order to take my breath away.

Now it being my turn, I feel the butterflies flap their wings as I open my mouth to speak. "It took me a while to realize I loved you. The way you smile to those dam cheese bun you make weren't what set me off. What caused me to come to my senses was that day five years ago when Finn drove up to the Seam in the pouring rain and over a few grill cheeses and a couple beers I came to realize that I loved you. That moment changed everything. And I don't know what to say, you are the one that's good with words... But I vow to stay, always." Peeta smiles at me and I can't help, but smile back. And with our vows done, Father continues the ceremony. The exchange rings, simple silver bands with something engraved inside from one another. Then Father speaks to Peeta. "You may kiss the bride." Peeta does just that, taking me by the waist, pulling me close and capturing my lips in his. We're married.

...

Peeta and I are sitting on the back step of Haymitch's as the few guest that remain helping clean up somewhere inside. I have my knees pulled close to my chest and Peeta's arm is wrapped around my waist, keeping me close to his side. And for the last few hours I couldn't help, but fine myself smiling. I was married,_ I was married to Peeta Mellark_. Continuing to smile, Peeta gives me a soft squeeze, surfacing me from my thoughts. "Why does the inside of my ring say 'Bread Boy?'" I smile thinking of how after weeks of thinking I thought "Bread Boy" would be the most appropriate thing to have engraved inside Peeta's ring. "'Cause," I smile, "You're my boy with the bread. Mister Baker. Mister I-make-the-best-cheese-buns-that-can-make-any-girl -swoon." He laughs, nodding his head. "Thank you, I suppose." "Welcome," I say as I rest my head against his chest looking down at my own band on my left ring finger. I haven't looked at it yet and I was kind of wondering what Peeta had written. Thus pulling the ring off my finger, I look to see what's engraved. _Pearl. _"Pearl," I ask. "Mh hmm," he says, "Pearl, the most beautiful gem in all the sea, just like you."

Unable to hold back a smile, I laugh, "You're so corny." He proudly nods in his head in agreement, unwrapping his arm around from my waist and standing up. Then offering me his hand, he ask, "Dance with me?" And unable to say no, I allow him to take my hand in his. Then with a firm grip, he pulls me off the deck. At this point, the music has stopped and no one remains expect for Haymitch and whoever else somewhere inside the house. So standing there in the sand, barefoot, my arms hooked around Peeta's neck and his around my waist, I recognize there is a small film of gray along the coast. And as we sway back and forth I can't help, but be happy. Everything was perfect. I was now married to Peeta Mellark, the boy I loved. We didn't know what was going to happen, but we had one another. We loved one another and that was what mattered. Continuing to sway, I rest my head in the crook of his neck and he pulls me close. "I wish I could freeze this moment forever." "Me too."


End file.
